The Odyssey of The Odyssey

No, I’ve never read Homer’s epic poem/book The Odyssey, so let’s get that out of the way. 

But this weekend I did see Christopher Nolan’s film interpretation, The Odyssey.  As did more than a quarter billion dollars-worth of ticket buyers.

How was it?

Brilliantly made, very well-acted and an incredible sweep of the visual wonders of the world. 

At almost three hours it is never uninteresting and often captures ancient times as metaphor for contemporary times in a way that is quite accessible.  And …apt. 

The Odyssey' Review: Matt Damon in Christopher Nolan's Homer Epic
I too grew a beard while watching it

Sadly, we as a species have not moved on much from 6th century B.C. in terms of pillaging villages, people and whole countries to accrue power and riches for our own benefit, faux safety or simply because we can.

And in terms of the human story, well, that’s also timeless.  And best summed up by my husband of many years early on in our relationship back in the late 1980s when he was studying for his PhD in film studies:

It’s always about the father.  Or mother.

Matt Damon, Anne Hathaway and Tom Holland Share 'Odyssey' Memories  (Exclusive)
And this Mother is serving in this outfit

In other words, just when you think you’re living through the darkest times of the apocalypse you realize the apocalypse has been going on since the beginning of man and has no intention of letting up any time soon.

If ever.

And that the more you try to run away from your family the more your responsibility to it will haunt you.  Or even help you.  If you let it.

Which does not mean this film and this story is not hopeful or moral or, dare I say the word, entertaining. 

It is.

It is also brutal, depressing, thoughtful, violently graphic and, well, dare I say it, beautiful.

The Odyssey' Review: Thrills and Spills Highlight Familiar Tale | KQED
We can’t argue with sleeveless costume design

Apocalyptic behavior Nolan-ized for our contemporary pallets and collective benefits.

Consider its lessons on your own terms or simply resume your video game, news channel or screen of choices. 

No god can tell you what to do and at the end of your day it’s your choice anyway.  Just as it was in a civilization where there actually were gods that possessed powers our contemporary faux gods can only dream of. 

And do dream of.   To our mass detriment.

Perhaps they should see this film, also, and consider their own father, or mother, story.

And consider there was a time when a leader went off to war in a skirt instead of skirted the responsibility to do so.

Ohh Snap GIFs | Tenor
Good one, Chairy

I’m only half-kidding.

Here’s the thing with gods of any kind. 

I’m not much for them and their mythical “powers”.  Or the belief that they can heal what ails you. 

For me, it’s difficult to take the myth of it all seriously.  To believe there is some divine arbitrary resurrected personage or energy or all-knowing being that controls things in a certain way in a civilization made of endless, ordinary humans.

Every Zendaya red carpet look from 'The Odyssey' press tour
Ok but can I still pray to Zendaya’s Odyssey press tour looks?

So when the film leans too hard into the supernatural woo-woo it began to lose me in a miasma of junior and senior high school lessons I forever zoned out of and had no interest in. 

To this day, I have to consistently look this stuff up every time a student brings a group of these historical deities, who create their own rules and carry all this legacy power to use at their supposedly wide and very subjective discretion, into their stories. 

Not to mention, it all seems to divert the responsibility we all have to be our version of divine goodness and the heroes of our own collective stories.

In Defense of Tom Holland's Spider-Man – The Comenian
I’m a hero in every story, though

But if a god is what floats your boat, and the actions you take because of it doesn’t involve murdering me or my family, throwing us out of our home or keeping us down in any way, have at it.

Though sadly in Nolan’s world, a perfect metaphor for ours on this subject, this is not the case.

Too many gods spoil the broth.  So to speak.

Because when you get into god territory it’s not too easy to tell the imposters from the real thing and the real world.

LONDON, ENGLAND - JULY 06: (L-R) Charlize Theron, Zendaya, Anne Hathaway, Lupita Nyong'o, Samantha Morton and Mia Goth attend 'The Odyssey' London Premiere at Odeon Luxe Leicester Square on July 06, 2026 in London, England. (Photo by Tim P. Whitby/Getty Images for Universal Pictures)
Gods in real life and the movies… let’s be honest

Better to look inside and learn the lessons from the best father or mother figure you can find. 

And not necessarily, the biological kind.

All that said, and if it matters to you, The Odyssey is bound for lots of Oscar gold, especially in its technical categories.  Also look for nominations for Christopher Nolan, Matt Damon, Anne Hathaway and perhaps even Sammantha Morton in a very memorable, mid-movie sequence.

As for winners, well Mr. Nolan and all of us have already won because we’ve got an epic movie movie to go to this summer.  The kind that it’s well-worth going out of your house to and braving all the vagaries of air, land and water for in these hopefully faux apocalyptic times.

The Odyssey Official Trailer

Things You Can’t Say

Screen Shot 2016-06-05 at 11.56.41 AM

It was one of those weeks. Suffice it to say – don’t ask.   But if I had said everything that I thought, desperately wanted to say or almost said – I, well…

But then I thought – what’s the point of a blog, anyway? To write everything your best self would never say — to your readers.   Perhaps you’ve had one or two of these same thoughts yourself. Or maybe one or two will inspire you to share some of your own with others? Just think how much better – or worse – the world would then be. And relish it.

To the cop waiting in his patrol car on the top of a hill in front of a shuttered park:

You don’t give a crap about safety. I could see it in your eyes as you barreled down towards me. No, you wanted to give me a ticket because you either had a quota to fill or you’re p.o.’d because you’re short – even shorter than me (5’7”) and it gives you a perverse unspoken pleasure. You hate your job AND you hate your life.

Starting off strong, Chairy

Starting off strong, Chairy

And for the record, I NEVER speak in the car actually HOLDING my cell phone. It’s always on speaker or Bluetooth. But my 87-year-old father is ailing and it looked like the number of one of his health care workers so when the remote failed and I couldn’t find the speaker button I just HAD to pick it up. I tried to explain this to give not an excuse but a context and didn’t expect a break from you. But what I got was a condescending nod and a walk-away. You’re a dick. And you’ll always be smaller than I am – in every area – no matter what arena we’re in. #Copette

To the brilliant Anthony Hopkins:

Transformers 6? Really???? I remember those days when you were doing Equus on Broadway. And this was decades before you won the Oscar for Silence of the Lambs. And well before you did Remains of the Day. Not to mention Nixon, Howard’s End and even Mask of Zorro. It’s brilliant you cashed in reprising Hannibal Leccter in Hannibal and Red Dragon. Mission Impossible 2 – we get it. Even the Thor movies sort of make sense following noble duds like Alexander, Titus and Noah. 

On second thought.... #maybenot

On second thought…. #maybenot

No Tony, I couldn’t turn down$5 million, $10 million, $15 million or whatever you’re getting. But can’t you simply be Iron Man’s grandfather? Or at least a Spiderman super villain? Did you have to go to #BayLand? Fine – alimony, child support or you might lose the house in Malibu. But if you’re simply doing this for some new kitchens, swimming pools or generational visibility, I’m done. Do not #MichaelCaine1980sMe.

To Mitt Romney:

I still disagree with practically everything you stand for and find every other word out of your mouth dripping with condescension – especially when it comes to pushy gay Jews like myself. But I will give you major props for being the only high profile Republican politician to publicly and vocally still refuse to endorse Donald Trump. Who would have guessed you’d out maverick McCain or out boy scout Paul Ryan.   Still, there’s an extremely low bar out there from which to excel. #Bully4Mittens.

I think I need to get my eyes check #saywhaaa

I think I need to get my eyes checked #saywhaaa

To Tina Fey:

You’re great but how many more American Express commercials are there? Two? Ten? And why? Why, why, why, why, why??? (Note: See Anthony Hopkins). One can’t help but think it’s the agents. Except, it can’t be. Not really. You’re too young to be Bill Murray’s character in Lost in Translation. And besides, those spots only aired in Japan. #YoureNotAlecBaldwin.

Paying for her daughters' college tuitions? or funding the Mean Girls musical?

Paying for her daughters’ college tuitions? or funding the Mean Girls musical?

To haters of L.A., NYC and San Francisco:

It’s ridiculously expensive to live here because too many people want to live here. This is not our fault. It is everyone’s fault. Yes, the air is cleaner in Cheyenne, WY and Bismarck, N.D. And houses are a lot cheaper in Waco, TX.

Waco or bust. #shiplap #drinkingtheKoolAid

Waco or bust. #shiplap #drinkingtheKoolAid

So? No one is twisting your arm NOT to relocate there (as much as Chip and Joanna Gaines may try). Or to move here. That being the case – please, can the eye rolls stop towards us when you’re talking in public about American values or in private about where you find the real people who make up this country? And we’ll stop dishing about how dumb you are. Or, well, at least I will. #Maybe.

To visitors in my home:

Yes, we have a movie poster with a picture of Judy Garland on it and another vintage one being framed from the movie All About Eve. This doesn’t only mean my husband and I are gay.

Guilty

#Guilty

It also shows that we have good taste in entertainment and like the color combination of red and cream and how it mixes with the blues and yellows in the rest of the house. (Note: Fine, #Gay). Not to mention, the Citizen Kane poster is too expensive, the Ordinary People poster is too depressing and nowadays Woody Allen gets people too upset. Plus, we can’t afford a Jackson Pollock and will likely never be able to. Still, we do cop to a lack of sports memorabilia, Star Wars toys, and gym class experience. In fact, I, for one, served as attendance monitor my entire senior year of high school P.E. class and never had to change into shorts or break a sweat once in 10 months. #CrazylikeaQueen.

To MSNBC:                                     

Rachel Maddow is my oracle and too often there is a false equivalency made between you and Fox News. Still, your non-stop pursuit of all things Trump is making it impossible to defend you to others.

In the spirit of Roseanne Roseannadanna.. what are you tryin' to do, make me sick??

In the spirit of Roseanne Roseannadanna.. what are you tryin’ to do, make me sick??

Know that it’s one thing to report the news in all of its bizarreness and quite another to broadcast an endless loop of the same incoherent blathering over and over and over again for hours with only a few added sound bytes every few minutes from each one of your paid commentators. Take some of the money you saved by unwisely firing Alex Wagner and hire someone with the guts to do something ingenious – like ambush a real politician against their will and ask them a question no one else has. Then film it. And air it. #SaveHowardBeale.

Hey gurl. #changingchannels

Hey gurl. #changingchannels

To Hillary Clinton:

Good speech. Your Trump hit lines most likely to persuade fence sitters to your side:

Imagine him deciding whether to send your spouses or children into battle.

– Imagine if he had not just his Twitter account at his disposal when he’s angry, but America’s entire arsenal.

– I will leave it to the psychiatrists to explain his affection for tyrants.

Now make some of the news reports true and choose Elizabeth Warren as your veep.  In a show biz age, she’ll give you the smartest, most solid and sassiest support to take on the Orange Clown.

To #Drumpf:

You’re a mentally ill racist. Go away and get some therapy. Or at least go away. Now be gone, before someone drops a house on you, too.