Tin Foil Hat Fitting

I live in Los Angeles and Adam Schiff is my senator. 

Yup.  Him. 

This guy right here

The guy who was head of the House Intelligence Committee from 2019-2023.  The one who was lead impeachment manager in the first impeachment trial of the 45th president of the U.S. 

The Jewish guy Trump still refers to as Shifty Schiff.

Cannot roll my eyes more

I can’t claim to know FOR SURE what POTUS means by the nickname, meaning I can’t prove it in a court of law.  But what I do know is that one of the racist stereotypes about we Jews is that we’re shifty.  Meaning you can’t trust us. 

Apparently this dates back to the 12th century when French theologian Peter of Blois introduced the idea that we Jews could change shapes in order to deceive people.  He likened us to The Devil, who I guess is a guy able to morph into monstrous shapes in order to advance his own nefarious, and bottom line poisonous, agenda to turn the world against itself.

Obfuscating who you really are and what you truly want to do by posing as a bottom line nice guy who cares?

Imagine!

Red tie and all

Well, what do I know? The fact is, we Jews don’t believe in the Devil or even Hell. 

Though nefarious and bottom line poisonous agendas are a fact of life you accept the older you get.  You can’t prove them in a court of law but, like obscenity, you get to know them when you see them.

As I watch tens of thousands of federal workers fired without reason by button-pushing twenty-something DOGE bros, many of them self-avowed racists; veterans benefits being slashed, and the hollowing out of every major government agency by new leadership who previously questioned the very necessity of that agency, my obscenity buzzer has been going off non-stop. (Note: As opposed to getting off, which seems likely to soon become a punishable felony if Project 2025’s plan to outlaw porn on the Internet becomes the reality there is no reason to believe it won’t be.)

Think I should try wiggling my nose?

I mean, it doesn’t take a genius to wonder if it’s a good thing to have our new Secretary of Health and Human Services reacting to a concerning outbreak of measles in the southwest by suggesting the use of cod liver as a remedy before a proven 97% effective measles vaccine.  A shot that quickly became a CURE for a lethal and HIGHLY contagious disease that infected 3-4 million people annually and killed many, many thousands, mostly children, prior to the mid-1960s.

A disease that was deemed eradicated in the U.S. in 2000, before vaccine skeptics like Sec. Robert F. Kennedy Jr., began muddying the waters.

Too much?

Can I prove in court Sec. Kennedy is responsible for the rise in measles, or that his heroic father, the late Robert F Kennedy, Sr., is rolling over in his grave at his son’s actions?  Certainly not.

No more than I can prove it’s not a good idea to have a guy who has zero medical training who very publicly waxed nostalgic recently about his early days as a heroin addict because it allowed him to finally focus in college, as HHS secretary for 360 million people.

You just get a feeling about things. 

That sums it up

And when you pay attention to facts and deeds – not as you want them to be but as what they really are – you begin to find that your instincts about more than you can imagine turn out to be spot on.

For instance, imagine literally watching one very large and powerful country – okay, let’s say Russia –  drop a bunch of bombs on a much smaller country – fine, for argument’s sake let’s say the Ukraine – three years ago in videos from right, left and center news sources all over the world. 

What videos??

Then imagine, just a week or two ago, the president of another large country – YOUR country – and for lack of a better example and because so many readers live in America, let’s say it’s the United States – claiming that Ukraine was the real culprit because it was Ukraine that actually invaded Russia three years ago?   

Would you believe that leader of the United States, or what you and everyone else saw through their own eyes.  More importantly, based on facts and experience, would you blanketly believe ANYTHING said, by that particular leader of the United States, about anything important ever again?

Uh… sure

And let’s go further, would you even believe them about the price of eggs???

When the richest man in the world – Elon Musk – gleefully bounced up and down brandishing a bejeweled chain saw a few weeks ago at an ultra-conservative political conference, reveling in all the billions of dollars in government jobs and services he was, ahem, cutting  (Note:  In fact, it turned out it was merely in the low hundreds of millions, not billions) it was bad enough. 

But once you heard the president of U.S. encourage him to cut even more, it began to make me wonder about…a lot of things.

I’m getting good at these

And as I listenied to #47 bore into Social Security during his speech before Congress last week, lying about billions of dollars of payments to scamming and dead US citizens up to 350 years old that were still listed on the digital payroll (Note:  It turns out that these dozens of thousands of people listed digitally receive ZERO payments because it’s more expensive and confusing to the system to erase their names digitally) my obscenity buzzer began to go off. 

Again. 

And incessantly. 

Red flags everywhere!

Especially after in his speech he declared Mr. Musk the head of DOGE, publicly and forcefully contradicting the legal briefs he had government lawyers file just days before that Mr. Musk was NOT running the agency but was merely an advisor.

And especially in light of DOGE’s most controversial move weeks before.  The courts granting them permission to copy ALL of the digital information on EVERY AMERICAN the social security administration has on file in the entire country.  That’s everyone who works or has ever worked.  Almost ALL of us.

And not just our payments.  Where we live. Where we bank.  How much we earn.  Our next of kin.    Our medical records.  Where we vote.  What we own. 

ALL. OF. IT.

I’m outtie

Now, what could the richest man in the world – a tech genius with billions of dollars in U.S. government contracts, a guy who contributed approximately $300 million, likely more, to get #47 elected, be planning to do with that information, along with the guy he helped get elected?  What did that money buy him but, more importantly, was his technological acumen able to provide #47 anything ELSE in return?

If you believe what he was spouting while waving that chainsaw up in the air, like a Roman warrior about to make a kill, this is all about saving the government money.  But in what way?  And how will we ever know? 

Uh oh they’re back

Social security payments in the hands of the richest man in the world who grew up in apartheid South Africa with a father who was a proud neo-Nazi and has blamed the LGBTQ woke community for turning one of his children trans, does not bode well for people like me and Sen Schiff.  (Note: And forget he’s got 13 offspring. And counting).

Nor does #47’s proclamation in his speech last week that “God saved” him from an assassin’s bullet during his presidential campaign to make America great again.

Am I repeating myself again?

Instead consider — what exactly does THAT mean?  And for whom?  And how?

I can’t prove it in a court of law, but whatever it is it doesn’t bode well for democracy.

Ariana Grande + Cynthia Erivo – Oscars Opening Number

Barbenheimer Whiplash

Now that Barbie has sold more than ONE BILLION dollars of tickets at the box office worldwide and our beloved Greta Gerwig has become the #1 commercial female director in movie history, it’s time for the complaints.

We’ve been waiting!

Oh, but wait.

Now that Oppenheimer has sold more than $600 million dollars of tickets at the box office worldwide and proven there is no ceiling to how popular, acclaimed and profitable THREE HOURS of dark, dramatic filmmaking can be, it’s time to eviscerate Christopher Nolan and IT into the cinematic equivalent of swiss cheese.

Boo hoo, right?

Bring. It. On.

I know.

Nevertheless, this is why we can’t have nice things.

As life goes on you get to the point where you not only realize you can’t please everyone, but that you really don’t give a sh-t and stop trying.

In reality, the only person you can actually please is yourself. 

And even that is unlikely.

Harumphhhh.

Especially when you are doing something artistic.

Actually, the arts are no different than life in that regard so let’s amend that thought to include everything.  When you try to be (or do or create) all things to all people you wind up with not much of anything worth spending time with.

I tell writing students that it doesn’t matter if a subject they write about has been done before because:

a. Everything (and everyone) has been done before, and

b. If you dig deep and tell the story in a personal (Note: But necessarily autobiographical) enough way, it can’t help but be original because no one has exactly your take on the world (Note: Clones, accepted).

Awww shucks

It only took me decades of therapy to get to this point but here I am preaching what the most truly evolved of us knew far earlier in life. 

Still, better late than never.

I was a movie critic at Variety for many years, many decades ago, and the most astute remark I ever heard about critics came from my colleague Jim Harwood, a really smart guy who sat at a desk to the left of me and used to write for the Wall Street Journal before covering show business and writing short clever columns about people like Ted Turner and Kirk Kerkorian long before that was popular.

When someone asked him once what qualified him to be a critic, he turned tartly to them and without missing a beat, said:

Because I have an opinion and a place to print it.

I said, what I said

Now, of course, EVERYONE does.

Including me.

God (Note: Or whoever you imagine Her to be) help us all.

See, what Harwood, as we all called him, got before any of us and is worth reminding all of us of at this moment, is that critical thought is nice but it’s not an absolute and there isn’t a right or wrong.

There’s simply an opinion.      

Exactly

There are a lot of boys (Note: Well, adult males acting like little boys) up in arms about what they perceive as the small-mindedness in which they are ALL being portrayed in a film about a doll. 

Just as there are lots of conservatives foaming at the mouth that a short sequence where little girls toss aside their Betsy Wetsy-like infant dolls in favor of a hip, curvaceous, fashion -forward plastic version of young women, means motherhood is in peril and the very future of society as we know it is being put at risk.

Oh.  My. Goddess.

eyeroll of the century

The complaints about what was going on in the mind of the genius man who supervised the invention of the first nuclear bomb and enabled it’s launching is a bit more complicated but nevertheless operates on the same principle.

Choosing to show a genius of the 1930s, 40s and 50s working in a boy’s club of mostly men (Note: Despite the fact that far less than 5% of the scientists working with him at Los Alamos were women) must mean that the filmmaker, not the math genius, ignores (nee marginalizes) women.   And the idea that the two primary sexual partners shown in his life were a female biologist and a female psychiatrist is further proof that the guy who made this movie can only see women as his own personal sexual receptacles. 

um… hmmm… uh… well…

Worse yet, is the clear racism employed by not showing re-recreated or existing documentary footage of the actual atomic bomb going off at Hiroshima and Nagasaki and getting to literally view the faces of tens of thousands of Japanese people being ripped away. 

That couldn’t be an artistic choice to center the film on the man’s existential crisis of good vs. evil and not the literal enormity of the bomb.  It can only be the means by which one gets to negate every achievement that came before it and dismiss the film, in its entirety, as a relic of storytelling of the white male privilege kind.

Well, I mean, Chris Nolan IS a white guy who is a bit of a genius just as Greta Gerwig IS a feminist with a passion for the color pink and cheeky comic irony.

What else could, or SHOULD, their movies be???

help!!

Oh, OF COURSE I get the complaints and where they’re coming from.

I’m not a TOTAL moron.  (Note: Even though it might be easier to dismiss me as such.)

But to accuse the films as either a whitewashing of history or a too woke view of men and/or women-hood is truly a bit reductive.

I was tempted to use the word self-serving but that would be a putdown to anyone else’s viewpoint, which I don’t seek to do (Note: No matter how tempting).   It’s merely to suggest that no one work or person or place can be 100% inclusive of everything and/or everyone.

Sorry?

And even if they could, guaranteed a bunch of the rest of us wouldn’t like the result of that either.

So instead, here’s a thought: 

If you don’t like what’s out there – do your own film.  Or, get a group of friends together who think like you do and have them do it. 

Or write it.  Or sing about it.  Or paint it.  Or rhyme it in couplets.

And then disregard anything I, or the world, has to say.  Especially if other people, but most importantly you, like it.

Billie Eilish – “What Was I Made For?” (from Barbie)