Sorry, No, Not quite

My dear friend, whose parents were Holocaust survivors, and who is also a Jewish lesbian married to a blonde, native-born German woman both she and I and my husband adore, told me to write about this.

Not that I wouldn’t have.

The this is one of thousands of takeaways I had the day after watching the hours-long live stream of what now looks like approximately 5000 (mostly) White domestic terrorists storming the doors of Capitol Hill more than a week ago.

But first a Quick Recap of Their Mission:

To HANG MIKE PENCE!, kidnap and/or murder House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, and stop the count of the Electoral College votes that were about to ratify Joe Biden as our new president.

All so they could ultimately… keep Donald J. Trump in the White House?

Still… trying… to… understand

Yeah, as crazy, unlikely and run-on-of-a-sentence-and-scheme all of the above would seem, especially to friends of mine who died in the eighties and nineties, every bit of it is true.  

What is also true is the cornucopia of crazy among the crowd.  A veritable live basket of the very same metaphorical deplorables that Hillary Clinton got castigated for calling out, say, some 1000 years ago at this point.

She won’t say “I told you so” but we know… we know.

You had the conspiracy theorists and the racists.  The amateur militia men and women playing dress-up, as well as the real-life former, present or retired men and women of the military and/or law enforcement who decided, well, enough is enough with the rule of law they’d spent most of their lives defending. There are some things that are simply worth dying and defacing for.

There were also the tourists there for a good time taking selfies, the scatological freaks who wanted to relieve themselves somewhere in the Capitol Rotunda so they’d have a story to tell their grandchildren (Note: What other reason COULD there be???), as well as any number of regular people that like to blow off steam at massive Trump rallies, especially ones where he says he’s going to fight along with them but fails to deliver on his promise (Note:  Are there any other kind?)

Easy to identify because they have a uniform

And then, somewhere in this very large and very motley group, because why wouldn’t they be, were the Jew haters.

Now I’m not saying there weren’t haters of many other stripes and colors worth noting.  But with so much hate boiling over so many in the US citizenry these days it’s surprising that I, Jew that I am, wouldn’t take this for granted. 

For when it comes to attempted executions and hate-filled rhetoric in a White nationalist revolution, we Jewish people have a permanent place on the menu.

No need… we know how this goes.

It’s like I know it, and yet, I sometimes forget, what with all my other offensive identities during the Trump years.  These include:

  1. A gay man from New York
  2. Who lives in Hollywood
  3. And alternately works as both a screenwriter AND as a college professor
  4. After being trained as a journalist and starting out as a reporter, nee member of the fake media
  5. A person who is and always will be a liberal Democrat, NEVER hesitates to share that with anyone and is ALWAYS up for an argument
My own version of a Golden Ticket!

Any one of these could probably get me trampled, pummeled, kidnapped or killed at any Trump event.  But add Jew to the mix at an insurrection and, well… it’s practically overkill.

So when I got a glimpse at the photo now seen round the world of the Jew-hating Trump supporter wearing a sweatshirt emblazoned with the words CAMP AUSCHWITZ (Note: the renowned Nazi concentration camp) along with the sub-heading, WORK BRINGS FREEDOM, the English translation of the expression tacked right above the gate of the camp that tens of thousands of Jews entered but never exited from, is it any wonder all I could think of to do was roll my eyes and sigh,

Really, is THAT the best you can do?????

Full Miranda moment

It’s not that the man and his outerwear are not disgusting and outrageous but the truth is that just felt soooooo 1950s, standing there in a sweatshirt that was just that plain dumb and that plain uninspired. 

Where did you buy that, at the Third Reich outlet store in Boise?  Or Alexandria?  Is it poly cotton or all polyester?  Like we don’t know what you’re trying to do.

Sure there’s an element (well more than an element) of danger about it, but there’s not as much safety to be had these days as there used to be.  The key is to speak out to the imminent threat but to do so in a way, and with the folks and at the time, it will be the most effective… and most worth it.

It made me think of the incident writer-humorist Fran Lebowitz recently recounted in the great seven-episode limited Netflix documentary series her friend Martin Scorsese just directed about her, Pretend It’s A City.

Maybe the only person they’d hate more than me

Sometime in the eighties or nineties there became renewed interest in Nazi propagandist filmmaker Leni Riefenstahl, whose fetishized images of the Third Reich and Hitler in such technically innovative films like Triumph of the Will and Olympia, began to be rediscovered and re-examined in light of her talents as a female filmmaking pioneer.

So much so that Ms. Riefenstahl had traveled to New York City, where a member of the artist crowd Fran knew invited her to a small dinner party he was planning to have with, um Leni, in attendance.

I have no interest in having dinner with her, Fran (LEBOWITZ) cuttingly replied.  And when he tried to get her to admit Leni was a great artist and how could she blah, blah, blah, she reiterated –

I. HAVE. NO. INTEREST. IN. HAVING. DINNER. WITH. HER.

It needed to be repeated #icant

It’s like arguing Hitler was a brilliant politician and for that reason alone he’d be worth a chat.

Or if Trump manages to avoid jail in his post-presidency and somewhere down-the-line he tries to get re-examined and re-invited back into mainstream acceptance, well maybe we can learn something from being in his presence again that we couldn’t discern on our own.

Can you even imagine?

Though one can’t help but wonder what would that inevitable dinner party look like?  Who would attend?  It certainly wouldn’t be any of the types just seen barnstorming Capitol Hill.  They are not how you rehabilitate an image.  They are simply an inconvenient truth.

Speaking of which, Trump’s alternative fact master, the very nimble though not a smidge more sincere Kellyanne Conway, proved this as a guest on Real Time with Bill Maher Friday night,the first stop on her mainstream rehabilitation tour.

Revealing it has been 8-9 months since she’s done a TV interview, to which Mr. Maher politely thanked her for choosing him because she had soooo many choices, the two paired for a cutesy old friends fest of polite jabs, fun times (Note: Remember that red, white and blue suit KCon wore to Trump’s inauguration – Bill loved it!) and gentle political banter.

Nope… no thank you… please go now.

Not only was it off-brand for the usually prickly Mr. Maher, it felt like the first step towards another type of revisionist history.  This would be a 21st century version of rehabilitation for yet another woman who, for reasons only truly known to herself, chose to employ her talent to promote a white male sociopathic political leader intent on bending the world to His Will and taking down anyone, and any country, including his own, in his way.

There should be no dinner parties, no Dancing with the Stars appearances and certainly no intellectual reexamination of anyone from those patently obvious end times we’ve just barely managed to live through.

Never forget this shanda

Instead we might consider justice through a series of trials for all those culpable like they did in Ms. Riefenstahl’s days, as well as the re-adoption of that age old, timeless slogan Never Again as we all attempt to pick up the pieces of our country and truly soldier on.

I know that’s this Jew’s plan.

The Chicks – “Not Ready to Make Nice”

Check out the Chair’s newest project, Pod From a Chair , now available on Apple Podcasts and Spotify!

Truth Hurts (but not really)

It is estimated Donald Trump has told more than 20,000 lies since he became the president of the United States.

I can’t do much about any of them. 

But the one thing I can do is to not let him make me into a liar.

The Chairy is better at the truth!

Trump has COVID-19, the potentially lethal virus he’s mask-lessly, and very purposely, downplayed to the rest of us for months. (Note: So far 210,000 Americans dead and 7.3 million infected).

Just how bad it is depends on who and what you believe.  But let’s put it this way, it was bad enough for him to be helicoptered to the hospital on Friday, reportedly after having trouble breathing and receiving oxygen. 

Airlifted to a nearby hospital? Totally normal, nothing to see here #WHAT

Right now this is where he sits, or lies, at Walter Reed Medical Center, benefitting (Note: Or not, how would you know for sure?) from top of the line, world-class medical treatment on the public dole.

Since then the man who refused to wear a mask and social distance – so far the prime protocols the medical establishment has urged us all to follow in order to prevent this potential killer– the protocols that he shamed Democrats, the media and, in fact, his own followers and personal staff working beside him for following – has received worldwide well-wishes, support and concern.

Ah, the old standby of “thoughts and prayers”

People are literally flooding him and falling all over themselves with public thoughts and prayers.  In particular, his opponents on Capitol Hill, on TV, and in any big industry, have prefaced their remarks about him and any issue regarding him by saying a myriad of creative and well-constructed platitudes.

They range from everything like:

Clearly, WE ALL wish the president a speedy recovery, to

As Americans we all want our president to be healthy, and on towards,

I think we can all safely say our hope is for, as soon as possible, President Trump to be safely back at work and behind the resolute desk where we can then disagree.  It’s what we, as American, are all praying for.

Hmm.  Well, given my lifelong penchant for honesty I gotta tell y’all the truth –

Not so much and not this American.

Yeah, I said it

I’m not proud of that, nor, am I ashamed of it.  I’m only offering it up as my absolute, unvarnished reality in the hopes of, in turn, setting us all free.

As humans we’re all imperfect and pretending to be otherwise doesn’t really get us anywhere.  I don’t wish Trump death, as I’ve read and privately/publicly heard others saying.  I just don’t wish him well, about anything. 

Pretty much this exactly

Yeah, I might save him from a burning building because I’m a human being but no, I wouldn’t risk my own life to do so.

We all decide what is a bridge too far for us and then attempt to do better if we believe we’re lacking.

I don’t think it helps anything or anyone to, um, make stuff up because it’s, um, beneficial to us in the moment.  Lies beget lies, which begets bad behavior, which in turn begets horrible power grabs and many more lies and consequences.

Isn’t that the way we got into this mess in the first place? That place where we pretty much don’t know whom or in what to believe?

She tried to warn us. #Hillaryforgiveus #actuallydont #dontdeserveyou

Perhaps one day I will evolve (or devolve, depending on your view) to be the kind of person strong enough to turn the other cheek at someone I have watched gleefully cause so many to suffer without batting a painted-on eyelash or eyebrow. But honestly, with this guy, right now, I’m not anywhere near that.

Nor are so many others I know and know of, despite what they are publicly espousing.  

This doesn’t necessarily make us evil, or even evil geniuses, just people who might be able to one day do better.  (Note: Or not.  It depends on what your definition of better is).

Guilty

But for right now, as someone recently, and most honestly, admitted (Note: And it’s one of the rare times he’s done so):

IT IS WHAT IT IS.

When it comes to abusive behavior towards others and innate meanness, when it involves rallying white supremacists to come out into the streets armed and intimidate everything good and free about law-abiding citizens just wanting to cast their votes or even protest, my well-wishing tends to be a bit more…measured.  Meaning it leans towards the oppressed and endangered.

When it comes to sympathy, my kind thoughts don’t extend to those who are sitting on several billion dollars in assets, paying zero in taxes and then publicly bragging about it to people who live in one and two room apartments.

Please enjoy your socialized medicine while you’re at it

When it comes to my heart, well, it doesn’t involve someone who knows they have been exposed to a potentially lethal virus and yet exposes hundreds or even thousands of people to it in order to rake in more money to support their political ambitions or, perhaps, even to infect the very person they’re running for office against.

When it comes to prayers, the first or even thousandth person on my list is not someone who confabbed and giggled and yeah, colluded with world leaders who seek the destruction of my country in order to get elected to the highest office in the land.  And it certainly doesn’t include a guy who used said office to make himself and his family business tens of millions of dollars in the process.

And that’s only the half of it

I could go on and on, gosh knows there is evidence and more than enough time these days.  But I think there’s enough here for you to fill in the rest.  If not, google non-white children separated from their parents, put in cages, and never returned to them on the U.S. border and see what you come up with.

People like to think of Trump as some sort of all-powerful superhero/villain (Note: Depending on where they stand) or an exceptional kind of evil geniusBut I don’t.  Sorry Michael Moore.

Right now I consider him nothing more than a sick, fat old man who has a lot of power but no conscience.  Someone who is street clever and will stop at nothing to stay in the presidency so he doesn’t have to face criminal charges in court like a regular citizen and possibly go to jail, or at the very least pay millions of dollars he likely doesn’t have accessible to him, in back taxes.

I need to find a hillside to scream at the top of my lungs

Someone I find just plain sad and mean and, yes, for now, regrettably with more power than many.  Kind of like, as I said to one friend recently, a really mean Oz.  But what’s behind the curtain is not a superpower, just a super liar who temporarily controls the levers of some earthly powers.

Someone who is dangerous but not omnipotent, as recent events prove.

This is why I can’t and don’t wish him my bestright now.  Nor do I wish him back on the job as his good ‘ole self in the near or even distant future.

What I prefer is for him to have a time out, sit in a hospital corner and have a good long think about what he’s done.  Like the child that he is.

Where is this balloon these days?

It probably won’t make a bit of difference but it’s the best that I, and many like me, can offer or feel at this point in time.

He’s not in my thoughts, among my hopes or anywhere near my heart, thank God. 

This doesn’t make me a bad person.  Just an honest one.

Lizzo – “Truth Hurts”