And So It Goes

You wouldn’t think Billy Joel and South Park’s season 27 kickoff episode skewering and, word has it, angering our current POTUS, would have much in common. 

But in the opening of the second part of the excellent five-hour HBO Max documentary on his career, Billy Joel: And So It Goes, the singer-songwriter makes a deceptively obvious statement about his work that is a bridge for a lot of common ground.

Everything I’ve done, everything I’ve lived through, has somehow made it into my music.

Sing it, Piano Man

Substitute the word music with any artistic creation that any of us make, and the conclusion is obvious.  Your work can’t help but express YOU – and exactly how YOU feel.

And when you do it right it has a particular resonance.

So why wouldn’t the now billionaire South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone, who just agreed to a new $1.5 billion, five-year streaming deal for their show to run exclusively on Paramount+,  go right for the jugular?

I mean… you had to see this coming

Their brand is mercilessly mocking pop culture figures, religion, current events and charlatans, as well as that week’s hypocrites and/or their zealous followers. 

It’d disappoint at least half the country, and at this point probably more, if they didn’t.

And take it from this gay, liberal Jew – NO minority status will save you.

Nor will being a member of the elite majority.

‘Merica

And after almost three decades of mind-bending successes, included the Tony award winning musical, The Book of Mormon – the world, and even their parent company CBS/Paramount, clearly wouldn’t have it any other way.

So once again – on their premiere episode this year:

Why WOULDN’T they make jokes about DJ Trump sharing a sexual bed with Satan; draw him with a talking micro-penis; and have him suing the residents of South Park for $5 million because of their growing street protests against him? 

Truly the tamest image from the entire episode

Why wouldn’t they show us reporters on the CBS/Paramount-owned show 60 Minutes all anemic and terrified of saying a cross word against him in light of the ACTUAL real-life network settling a generally accepted ridiculous ACTUAL real-life lawsuit Trump filed against the show for $16 million and more.

Not to mention –

How did they do this?

Why wouldn’t that premiere episode also call out the principal of the fictional South Park public school for suddenly requiring everyone to get on board with ONLY Christian values by bringing Jesus himself into school and making them befriend him?

Which finally leads us to ask one last question —

Why wouldn’t they portray Jesus being terrified of our Dear Leader of these United States coming after Him while trying to warn the town not to continue to offend the Big Man (Note: The, um, VERY VERY Big and ever-growing Man) in the White House?

This is/what they/do. 

Never change

It’d be like, well… going to a Billy Joel concert and him NOT playing Piano Man.

Talk about brands.

And speaking of such, perhaps THIS is the reason why the current Trump-Epstein scandal/association won’t go away? 

Well that was a turn!

Trump spent a lifetime ogling women, cheating on his wives, owning beauty pageants and bragging on tape he could grab any female by their private parts because he’s a star.

Wouldn’t the natural creative conclusion be that since he was such good friends with the world’s most notorious child molester, he might be hiding something more about his relationship with him? 

All sorts of ew

Especially since he seems to now be so desperately hiding the infamous Epstein files and having his former attorney – now second in command at the DOJ – suddenly meeting behind the scenes with Epstein’s convicted co-conspirator and former girlfriend in some sort of implied immunity from further prosecution deal in exchange for more information, or as some speculate, even some omission of information about one of Epstein’s…best friends and/or clients?

I think my brain just melted reading that

It stands to reason. Given the brand.  It seems so true to form for him.  Even, dare I say… honest??

Of course, what sounds honest is not necessarily true or real

At least these days.

But when it goes over so well and lingers for so long, the more likely that there is more than a smidgen of creative reality to it.

… just can’t shake ’em

At least that’s what people think in our conspiracy theory-led world.

Meaning even people in the White House and elsewhere who like to spread this stuff should be careful of what they wish for.

I didn’t mean to run out of space for Billy Joel. 

But as we learn in the documentary, he hates bullshit of any kind (Note: Often to a fault) and tends not to be political for the most part.

Until he is.

Billy starting another fire

One notable occasion was in the first Trump term when a bunch of Neo-Nazis marched through the peaceful neighborhood streets of Charlottesville, VA with Tiki torches, famously chanting, Jews Will Not Replace Us.

 And Trump went on television the next day proclaiming there were very fine people on BOTH sides.

Billy Joel, a Jewish guy from Long Island, wasn’t having it but wasn’t one for making speeches.

So what to do?

Well, the next night onstage at his concert he wore a large Jewish star made of yellow fabric sewn onto his jacket.

wow

That star was an exact replica of the ones many of his actual relatives in Germany were forced to wear in the years right before World War II.

And in the years that followed when they were carted away by the Nazis. 

Relatives he laments never getting to meet because they didn’t survive the concentration camps they were disappeared to.

You think Billy is kidding around?

Joel has always considered himself primarily an entertainer and over five hours one can’t help but get swept away not only by the music but the personal stories of abandonment, rejection, and misfortune – as well as a great deal of the rarefied talent and hard work that made him a fortune – or two or three – as well as world famous.

As a kid raised in Queens (Note: No, I’m nothing like Trump), you won’t be surprised to learn that I’ve been a lifelong fan of the guy from the moment I saw him in concert as an undergrad in the seventies at Queens College.

Tough, gruff, kinda nerdy hot, kinda scruffy, a piano virtuoso, fun, a little bit dangerous, smart as a whip AND funny.

Plus.. look at all that hair!

Luckily I wasn’t out then and never got to meet him or I would’ve been in a whole lot of trouble.

But trouble is a relative word with all sorts of good and bad innuendos and ominous meanings. 

Especially at a time when any one of us anywhere can be arrested at any moment for the most bizarre, trumped-up crime.

Or… well… not.

Billy Joel – “And So It Goes”

The Jewish Guido

Mazel!

Mazel!

If the guys I went to school with were movie characters they would be Jordan Belfort of Wolf of Wall Street and Irving Rosenfeld of American Hustle.  Two smart, charismatic and fast-talking Jewish guys from Queens, NY with morally questionable values, especially where money is concerned.  A stereotype, you say?  Uh, not when you consider how many Jewish male lead characters there have ever been in big major studio movies aside from Tevye in Fiddler on the Roof.  And besides — what major film studio heroes aren’t a bit, um…iconic.  In fact, those of us who are or could have been them prefer the word iconic.  Especially if it means – we’re the LEAD!

The truth is – you gotta start somewhere.

Martin Scorsese has spent half of his career immortalizing similar types of New York Italian guys in the movies but they are usually in the more tough talking form of Manhattan street thugs in Mean Streets, Taxi Driver, Raging Bull and Goodfellas – men who were certainly charismatic and street-wise but, on the whole, a lot tougher and muscular.  Plus, they could at least duck into Church for confession when things got dicey rather than eat themselves up from the inside out over anxiety.

Those kind of leading men tend to bleed into the aforementioned characters in our current crop of awards contenders.  Also, Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s wife-beater clad muscle head in Don Jon; Bradley Cooper’s co-lead detective Richie DiMaso in American Hustle; or even anti-hero Pat Solitano in last year’s Silver Linings Playbook.  Not to mention all the leads in The Godfather and Moonstruck.

There's gotta be an award out there for these curlers...

There’s gotta be an award out there for these curlers…

Which means if you put all the current Italian and Semitic boys from the boroughs together – which often happens in real life, not to mention in my own personal one – they comprise what I think of as a new ethnic stereotype I and my many childhood compadres from Queens have long awaited to be included on in film: The Jewish Guido.

(Note: See I can say that because I am one of them…well, sort of).

Who are we?  We are everything and more of what the major Hollywood studios think of as colorful and morally questionable.  No, we are not a Woody Allen character or Roberto Benigni from Life Is Beautiful.

Nope, not this Guido

Nope, not this Guido

We are a much more down and dirty, messy type of working/middle class person – a little crass, not afraid to speak our minds and, to put it bluntly: pretty good in bed – which is why we’re often a romantic lead who gets the girl at some point even if we can’t keep her.  You might not want to have us at a fancy dinner party or as your permanent spouse (Note: the latter is still in flux and debatable) but you most certainly want to include us if you aspire to learn how to rise up in the ranks of life or enjoy some unbridled, down and dirty fun.  In short, we have dreams and we’re not afraid to go for them in quite unorthodox and entertaining ways – even if there are overwhelming odds of failure or the likelihood that we will not have the best decorating sense once we achieve those dreams and have the cash to acquire whatever nouveau riche items you or we may crave.  Our reasoning:  if we don’t take that chance we’ll be stuck in Queens forever and, as we all know, with the right amount of money we can hire all the Waspy female decorators we want with taste and eventually charm them into at least having an affair with us after they’re done hanging the drapes.

Okay, so I may have exaggerated just a little bit.  But so are our personas.

This all started several weeks ago when I found myself thoroughly enjoying both    WoWS and AH while many of my friends insisted they reeked of disappointment, misguided storytelling and just plain unsympathetic, despicable characters.  Really?  I hadn’t noticed.  Isn’t this sort of the scrappy, exaggerated way Waspy movie characters behave, albeit with less money and more curse words?  No, claimed my Jewish guy friends from upstate New York, southern California and the Midwest.  They’re just awful people in uninvolving movies.   And those Waspy characters you are referring to are usually the villains, not the hero.

Did someone say Wasp?

Did someone say Wasp?

Well, okay.  Still, there is something to be said for seeing a version of you onscreen, even if it is a slightly unpleasant one.  If there is enough humanity and humor in the characterization you can get away with a lot of political incorrectness.  Enough elements of truth can counterbalance harsh generalities about the neighborhood or plot holes that you can drive a Miata through.  In addition, if you give these guys a little bit more of the macho power you craved when you were younger, or even last week, the fantasy is complete.  At least for some of us.

I can’t say I’m particularly proud of two Jewish guys from Queens being portrayed as people who swindled others out of money in order to lift themselves out of the doldrums of their own lower/middle class existences (Note: though if I had a choice I’d take the fictionalized Rosenfeld in American Hustle, who mostly stole from rich bad guys and didn’t kill people or cause them to kill themselves).  But now that Dustin Hoffman and Richard Dreyfuss are no longer leading men and only act sporadically, not to mention the total lack of movie roles for Steve Guttenberg in the last 20 years, you can’t blame me for binging a little on these types of recent and very public inroads. (Note: Yes there is still Jessie Eisenberg, born in Queens and raised in New Jersey – but c’mon, there is just nothing boroughs about him or any of his characters).

I made a movie with Barbra.. does that count?

I made a movie with Barbra.. does that count?

My notesfromachair co-hort Holly Van Buren suggested to me that the emergence of the Jewish Guido might have something to do with our current economic climate and the fantasy of the everyday working class man with the accent becoming victorious.  Not a bad thought.  It’s the boroughs way and certainly is a fine counterpoint to the seemingly omnipotent top 1%.  I mean, it takes a little bit of the crude and in your face in order to cut through all of that upper crust steeliness, right?

Plus, both Wolf and Hustle are period pieces from the seventies and eighties.  Clearly, enough time has passed where rather than championing a Gordon Gekko kind of financial wizard we can indulge in a more in-your-face punk upstart who beats the elite at their own game by any means necessary using the logic gleaned from a tougher life lived.

Still, there seems an even bigger factor – time.  American society may have grown more polarized these days but certainly its people have overall become far less homogenized.  There is ethnicity everywhere – so much so that is unusual for a day to go by on Fox News or right wing radio where the previously dominant White Male patriarchy, particularly in the south and Midwest, don’t wax nostalgic about the good old days and whine about losing their grip on power and the social and moral traditions (Note: one questions what they consider those were) that once made our Great Country great. This and the fact that same country, which less than two centuries ago legally enslaved all of its African American citizens in more than half of its states, has for the last six years had its first African American president presiding over everyone.

Yep.. and still the President.

Yep.. and still the President.

Those factors of time and ethnicity might also be responsible for the emergence of two other crossover major studio films about the African American community this year – 12 Years A Slave and Lee Daniel’s The Butler.  It is certainly no coincidence that as directors and other artists emerge in a position of power – like Steve McQueen and Mr. Daniels – the more chances there are of movies that reflect the history and/or experiences of their particular ethnic groups.  (Note:  Not that they can’t do anything else – both men have worked on “white” films).  It is also no accident that both of these directors have also earned money and acclaim in their recent past that have enabled them to do larger and more mainstream films with African American characters in the leads.  This is just the way it goes as long you can produce massive income with your often larger than life product.  Decades before Spike Lee had a certain degree of power among the major studios until his movies began underperforming at the box-office and the cache he was given by the powers-that-be to make his type of movies began to shrink. (Note: Mr. Lee also came of age at a time where there were far less non-white leads in films than there are today, making his road somewhat tougher).

Interestingly enough, all four aforementioned major films this year – Wolf of Wall Street, American Hustle, 12 Years a Slave and Lee Daniels’ The Butler – are also historical pieces that take place far and very much farther into the past.   There could simply be a certain drama to looking at events from a backwards lens.  Though surely it also provides a special kind of safety that gives the Hollywood community and its studio system a specific type of perfect cover.

the current state of Hollywood

the current state of Hollywood

Which all begs the question – why with all of the many, many male Jewish writers and directors working in the movie industry over the decades – not to mention that the studios themselves were founded by a large group of New York Jewish salesmen – have there statistically been such a lack of Jewish male characters as major studio leads on the big screen. I mean, if the African-American model holds, shouldn’t it follow that….?

Well, I have no provable idea.  But even in accounting for time and some evolution of thought, it is still worth noting that American Hustle’s David O. Russell is half-Jewish while Wolf of Wall Street’s Scorsese is very famously Italian.  So, at least in terms of the Jewish Guido, well — you do the math.

Or, to put my take on the whole thing another way, here is what Woody Allen’s quintessentially non-Guido/very Jewish character of Alvy Singer said when he first met his very ethnic-looking first wife Allison Portchnik (Carol Kane) in the 1977 classic, Annie Hall:

Woody-Allen-and-Carol-Kane-620x310

Alvy: You, you, you’re like New York, Jewish, left-wing, liberal, intellectual, Central Park West, Brandeis University, the socialist summer camps and the father with the Ben Shahn drawings…and the really, y’know, strike-oriented kind of, red diaper…stop me before I make a complete imbecile of myself

Allison: No, that was wonderful. I love being reduced to a cultural stereotype.

Alvy:  Right, I’m a bigot, I know, but for the left.