Hollywood from the Couch

I spent part of this weekend binge-watching the first three episodes of the new, gay-themed Canadian sports romance series, Heated Rivalry, on HBO despite being told the death of the movies was upon us.

Once again.

In any other era this would be sacrilegious for a movie lover.

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Allow me to explain

The funereal panic was related to the announcement that Netflix was buying Warner Bros. Discovery for the incomprehensible price (NOTE: To me, anyway.  I’m still smarting over $10 eggs) of $82.7 billion. A pending deal that, according to the N.Y. Times, could redefine Hollywood and the broader media landscape.

I have no doubt the above is true since Hollywood and media has been consistently redefining itself every couple of years since I first became professionally involved with it in the late 1970s.

Yes, I have all the career, financial and personal battle scars to prove it.  And one night, over cocktails, I’ll tell you all about if you so desire.  

all about eve gifs Page 2 | WiffleGif
Maybe some snowy night by the fire…

But more to the point, I have all the iterations of media and my own work to prove it.

Unopened boxes in my closet that contain VHS recordings of rare movies taped from network TV, cassette and eight tracks of movie soundtracks (Note: And more than a few vinyl records), a neatly tied bundle of laser discs (Note: A very short but very cool tech period, in my humble opinion), many drawers of CD movie themes/songs I bought or were sent to me from studios during awards seasons or for promotional purposes, and several walls full of DVDs my husband and I love having on hand even though three quarters of them are available on streaming services.

Add to that hundreds of original screenplays, pilots and treatments (Note: Several dozens of them my own) of very good work that was never made because they weren’t big enough, commercial enough, contemporary enough, relatable enough, young enough or just plain enough enough for the theatrical film market as it stood at the time.

Speaking for those projects that I DID NOT write, since no one can be objective about their own work, I promise you that determination is and was BULLSH-T since all of them could have been enough if given the chance.

Hi! I'm Anxiety. — World of Miley
Ya got that right

But, of course, it depends on what you mean by enough.  My definition is a film, or potential film or film element, that is entertaining or meaningful or satisfying to  group of people other than your friends and relatives. 

The theatrical deciders’ definition is a piece of material that will make them unlimited scads of money for the smallest amount of risk despite the tried and true adage, Nothing ventured, Nothing gained.

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Main priority

Meaning, screenwriter William Goldman’s summation of the movie business and all its marketplace gatekeepers in his seminal 1983 memoir Adventures in the Screen Trade still, and perennially, applies:

NOBODY KNOWS ANYTHING.

What especially no one knows anymore is what a movie is by 2025 and beyond standards and how it should or will be consumed. (Note:  Consumed?  What a horrible but applicable choice of words, as if we’re eating soylent green, though in a sense we are).

The chief complaint about Netflix and other streaming platforms is that their mere existence spells the death knell of the movie business, and the fact that it’s gobbling up one of what remains of a handful of big Hollywood studios ushers in the end of “movies.”

Well the view from my office would certainly change

After all, what incentive does Netflix have for people to watch a film outside of their homes, in a theatre (aka, the definition of a “real” movie)?

About as much as David Zaslav, a former cable/streaming exec who was put in charge of theatrical when he was made CEO of Warner Bros. Discovery in 2022 cares about it. 

Skeletor From Masters Of The Universe Trivia
His company portrait

Though probably more, since one of Zaslav’s first acts when put in charge was a cost-cutting measure that would’ve ended the one cable channel most beloved by movie lovers, TCM (Turner Classic Movies), as we know it, until filmmakers Paul Thomas Anderson and Martin Scorsese and others stepped in to exert a little… ahem… pressure.

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Bless you, Marty

This while Netflix stepped up and made movies and deals with some of the top directors in the movie business, including Martin Scorsese (The Irishman), Guillermo del Toro (Frankenstein), Rian Johnson (Knives Out II and III) and Greta Gerwig (the upcoming Chronicles of Narnia) and her husband Noah Baumbach (the just-released George Clooney starrer, Jay Kelly). 

All of these films have had or will have theatrical runs of various lengths and all the work of these and most other filmmakers will likely continue to do so.

Are they or will they be as long as they used to be?  Well, um, no.

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I mean… I think I could be OK with that

But to all of the movie consumers out there – nerds, intellectuals, horror fanatics, foreign film fans, the super-hero obsessed or rom-com fanatics – how many times have you uttered these four words in the last number of years:

Is it streaming yet?

a man in a yellow jacket is waving his hand
Guilty!

It is worth noting the film most likely to win this year’s best picture Oscar and, for my money, the best film of 2025, Paul Thomas Anderson’s One Battle After Another, was a Warner Bros. release that played a mere eight weeks before being available to rent or buy on streamers. 

This is not very long at all by traditional standards. And will undoubtedly vary depending on how much demand there is to see a film and how much money can be made on them.

One Gif After Another : r/paulthomasanderson
… and there he goes

I used to marvel when my parents recounted to me there was a time that they huddled around the RADIO to listen to original serialized storytelling.  The same way I did to my husband a few years ago when I suddenly realized true crime podcasts were becoming the new commercial “thing,” making something very recognizably radio popular again.

Do I long for the old days of movies?

Not so much.

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I’m with Margo

What I long for instead are the days of more good and great movies and less pure commercial garbage for the mythical lowest common denominator, non-thinking international, four quadrant audience.

And on that subject, I’d put more faith in Netflix than in the guy who treated Dr. Pimple Popper and 90 Day Fiancé with the same reverence as a Scorsese or Nolan film when he first listed them on HBO Max.

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Nuff said

Not that there is anything wrong with any film or TV show of any kind. Including the steamy Heated Rivalry, which I have every intention of watching in between this year’s Oscar movies – at the theatre and at home.

On my couch. 

Doom scrolling.

The Beach Boys – “In My Room”

My Favorite Movies… This Week

We were having a small, fun family dinner last week and one of our nieces wanted to know the answer to a very simple question:

What’s your #1  film?

Well… fasten your seatbelts

Being who I am I had to answer a question with a question before I could answer the question.

Ummm, well, do you mean the film that I think is the best film ever made or the film that I personally like the best? 

It didn’t help at all when she answered: 

How about both?

Oh it’s about to go down

Of course at this point I began explaining that either way I couldn’t narrow it down to one.  There are so many different types of movies I love and watch again and again but couldn’t claim were the best for anyone but me.  There were also others that I would place in the top five or ten that wouldn’t be my personal favorite but….

At which point someone else said, The Wizard of Oz and my husband interjected  Day for Night..

As I then began sputtering out in no particular order All About Eve, The Way We Were, Who’s Afraid Of Virginia Woolf?, Postcards from the Edge and Annie Hall (Note: The latter with the disclaimer that it used to be but now, well, it’s hard to watch, which led to a discussion of why, which I don’t want to get into for various reasons and is the subject of another blog).

Very, very this

I then quickly explained Hitchcock was one of my favorite filmmakers and that despite it not being his most artsy I just love Psycho. 

As well as most every Almodóvar movie, and many of the films of Paul Thomas Anderson.  But that I couldn’t leave out….Billy Wilder or Scorsese and that even though Gone With The Wind is so problematic from a contemporary lens I loved the book and the film as a teenager, which is ironic because of how pissed I was that BlacKkKlansman didn’t win the best picture Oscar that year over what I judged to be the far more retro Green Book and…

Well, you get it.

…and I’m spent

I’m a parlor game buzzkill because nothing is simple in my brain.  But as a lifelong movie fan, there is especially nothing is simple for me about the movies.

So much to love for so many reasons. 

And damn, what kind of gay man would I be if I didn’t include the restored Judy Garland version of A Star Is Born and Jacque Demy’s Umbrellas of Cherbourg?

See, I can’t stop.

It’s agony!

Which is sort of the point.

There is something about the movies. 

Plays are great, books are wonderful when they are and nothing is better these days than a great season of a streaming show. (Note: Yes, Baby Reindeer and Hacks were fantastic but this year I was riveted to Carmy’s existential crisis all through season three of The Bear and couldn’t care less how many stars his fakakta restaurant got – that wasn’t the point!).

Don’t even get me started on the Tina episode!

Not to mention music, museums and one of a kind events like Luna, Luna.

But if you’re a pop culture freak of nature of a certain age like I am, films are… well… forever.

Something immersive that’s eternally branded in your mind. 

Perhaps it’s because the second golden age of 1970s cinema was where I came of age. 

And what an age!

Maybe it’s that movies run such a gamut, or require brain power from totally passive to you better f’n pay attention or you’ll miss something. 

It could also be the special kind of escape they provide for a prolonged period of time without anyone else around – at home or in a darkened theatre – the latter being a place you can easily pretend no one else is around as long as no one’s brought their crying kid.  #ChildlessCatPeoplePower. 

Or thinks it’s their living room. #ShutTheFUp

#WhatWouldNicoleKidmanDo

In the more than a week since my niece asked her question I only today realized none of this matters because left to my own devices (Note: A dangerous place to be) films are my unwinding mechanism.

And there are not just one type nor do they have to be on my aforementioned “favorites”:

  • I happened to turn on TCM a few days ago and there were the beginning credits of Silkwood. A bunch of friends worked on it and I hadn’t seen it in years.  But I doubted I’d re-watch a story of radiation, friendship and corporate corruption even with the help of Mike Nichols, Meryl Streep and Cher because it’d been a trying week.  But it had me.  And kept me.  Not only did it hold up all these years but I found the sheer unabashed chauvinistic anger at the power of a strong woman like the late Karen Silkwood to be strangely energizing because of how absolutely infuriating and relevant it remains.
This movie did not get the hose!
  • But that doesn’t mean I wasn’t equally into the new feature-length documentary on MAX entitled, Elizabeth Taylor: The Lost Tapes, a few days before.  It’s an actual movie about THE biggest movie star of the 20th century which she narrates via numerous reels of “lost “tapes she recorded in the mid-late sixties for a planned biography that never came to be. 

She’s bawdy, funny, smart and clever but what she is more than anything else is honest.  It’s a treat to hear the dish on the movies, the life, the triumphs and the tragedies from the source but it’s even better to see it unfold in the filmic images and real-life footage put together in motion picture form by a director as creative as Nanette Burstein.

Spill girl spill!
  • I was busy this week but in the last couple of days the air sucked and my sinuses swelled so I chose to stay inside and read once I caught up on some politics (Note: Idiot).  At which point, I changed channels and there was another really great contemporary film that should have won the Oscar for best picture – The Social Network. (The King’s Speech? Seriously????).

I know, who wants to see the Mark Zuckerberg story at this point, right?  But I’d forgotten how much of an even-handed anti-hero Aaron Sorkin’s script made him and how well David Fincher’s frenetic filmmaking captured what, from our current rear view mirror, seems like a very strangely naïve era we couldn’t quite appreciate at the time. #MoviesCanDoThat.

One of THE best opening scenes
  • Not knowing I’d be writing about movies but still staying hermetically sealed at home I continued, checking out the much maligned recent film The Bikeriders starring Austin Butler and Jodie Comer.  Dismissed by many top critics and a few friends, it was bizarre, fascinating, funny and sort of touching.  I’m not into 1960’s motorcycle culture and I never imagined an English actress like Comer could so convincingly pull off working class Chicago (Note: Though why not after what she did on “Killing Eve?”) yet it was fascinating.  And Mr. Butler is just so much more enjoyable on a motorcycle than slithering his way through sand in Dune 2.
Should he be allowed to look this good?
  • I guess now is the time where I admit that before I gave in and went outside on a walk/run this afternoon I spent two hours rewatching the critical and audience drubbed film version of Jersey Boys, directed by Clint Eastwood.  Yeah, it’s sort of schmaltzy, a little cartoony and was definitely shot on the Warner Bros. backlot.

But jeez, it’s a movie fantasy musical melodrama.  And the soooonnnggggs.

I mean… just give in!

Sherry, Walk Like A Man, Big Girls Don’t Cry, Let’s Hang On, Working My Way Back to You…  And the Italian guys from the neighborhood I grew up with that I seldom hung out with but loved from afar.  Fuggedaboudit….

It was a time capsule back to an imagined version of the life of a real-life singer (Frankie Valli, of The Four Seasons) with movie mobsters, movie people and melodramatic movie heartbreak played against a purposely and infectiously nostalgic movie soundtrack.

It’s not Elizabeth Taylor, nor does it address corporate malfeasance, social media or the evolution of pop culture movements.  We have those, as well as many other films, for that.

And for a lot more.

Jersey Boys – “Sherry” (at the White House)