Hollywood from the Couch

I spent part of this weekend binge-watching the first three episodes of the new, gay-themed Canadian sports romance series, Heated Rivalry, on HBO despite being told the death of the movies was upon us.

Once again.

In any other era this would be sacrilegious for a movie lover.

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Allow me to explain

The funereal panic was related to the announcement that Netflix was buying Warner Bros. Discovery for the incomprehensible price (NOTE: To me, anyway.  I’m still smarting over $10 eggs) of $82.7 billion. A pending deal that, according to the N.Y. Times, could redefine Hollywood and the broader media landscape.

I have no doubt the above is true since Hollywood and media has been consistently redefining itself every couple of years since I first became professionally involved with it in the late 1970s.

Yes, I have all the career, financial and personal battle scars to prove it.  And one night, over cocktails, I’ll tell you all about if you so desire.  

all about eve gifs Page 2 | WiffleGif
Maybe some snowy night by the fire…

But more to the point, I have all the iterations of media and my own work to prove it.

Unopened boxes in my closet that contain VHS recordings of rare movies taped from network TV, cassette and eight tracks of movie soundtracks (Note: And more than a few vinyl records), a neatly tied bundle of laser discs (Note: A very short but very cool tech period, in my humble opinion), many drawers of CD movie themes/songs I bought or were sent to me from studios during awards seasons or for promotional purposes, and several walls full of DVDs my husband and I love having on hand even though three quarters of them are available on streaming services.

Add to that hundreds of original screenplays, pilots and treatments (Note: Several dozens of them my own) of very good work that was never made because they weren’t big enough, commercial enough, contemporary enough, relatable enough, young enough or just plain enough enough for the theatrical film market as it stood at the time.

Speaking for those projects that I DID NOT write, since no one can be objective about their own work, I promise you that determination is and was BULLSH-T since all of them could have been enough if given the chance.

Hi! I'm Anxiety. — World of Miley
Ya got that right

But, of course, it depends on what you mean by enough.  My definition is a film, or potential film or film element, that is entertaining or meaningful or satisfying to  group of people other than your friends and relatives. 

The theatrical deciders’ definition is a piece of material that will make them unlimited scads of money for the smallest amount of risk despite the tried and true adage, Nothing ventured, Nothing gained.

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Main priority

Meaning, screenwriter William Goldman’s summation of the movie business and all its marketplace gatekeepers in his seminal 1983 memoir Adventures in the Screen Trade still, and perennially, applies:

NOBODY KNOWS ANYTHING.

What especially no one knows anymore is what a movie is by 2025 and beyond standards and how it should or will be consumed. (Note:  Consumed?  What a horrible but applicable choice of words, as if we’re eating soylent green, though in a sense we are).

The chief complaint about Netflix and other streaming platforms is that their mere existence spells the death knell of the movie business, and the fact that it’s gobbling up one of what remains of a handful of big Hollywood studios ushers in the end of “movies.”

Well the view from my office would certainly change

After all, what incentive does Netflix have for people to watch a film outside of their homes, in a theatre (aka, the definition of a “real” movie)?

About as much as David Zaslav, a former cable/streaming exec who was put in charge of theatrical when he was made CEO of Warner Bros. Discovery in 2022 cares about it. 

Skeletor From Masters Of The Universe Trivia
His company portrait

Though probably more, since one of Zaslav’s first acts when put in charge was a cost-cutting measure that would’ve ended the one cable channel most beloved by movie lovers, TCM (Turner Classic Movies), as we know it, until filmmakers Paul Thomas Anderson and Martin Scorsese and others stepped in to exert a little… ahem… pressure.

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Bless you, Marty

This while Netflix stepped up and made movies and deals with some of the top directors in the movie business, including Martin Scorsese (The Irishman), Guillermo del Toro (Frankenstein), Rian Johnson (Knives Out II and III) and Greta Gerwig (the upcoming Chronicles of Narnia) and her husband Noah Baumbach (the just-released George Clooney starrer, Jay Kelly). 

All of these films have had or will have theatrical runs of various lengths and all the work of these and most other filmmakers will likely continue to do so.

Are they or will they be as long as they used to be?  Well, um, no.

Debating GIFs | Tenor
I mean… I think I could be OK with that

But to all of the movie consumers out there – nerds, intellectuals, horror fanatics, foreign film fans, the super-hero obsessed or rom-com fanatics – how many times have you uttered these four words in the last number of years:

Is it streaming yet?

a man in a yellow jacket is waving his hand
Guilty!

It is worth noting the film most likely to win this year’s best picture Oscar and, for my money, the best film of 2025, Paul Thomas Anderson’s One Battle After Another, was a Warner Bros. release that played a mere eight weeks before being available to rent or buy on streamers. 

This is not very long at all by traditional standards. And will undoubtedly vary depending on how much demand there is to see a film and how much money can be made on them.

One Gif After Another : r/paulthomasanderson
… and there he goes

I used to marvel when my parents recounted to me there was a time that they huddled around the RADIO to listen to original serialized storytelling.  The same way I did to my husband a few years ago when I suddenly realized true crime podcasts were becoming the new commercial “thing,” making something very recognizably radio popular again.

Do I long for the old days of movies?

Not so much.

23 Classic Hollywood GIFs That Are Better Than A Time Machine
I’m with Margo

What I long for instead are the days of more good and great movies and less pure commercial garbage for the mythical lowest common denominator, non-thinking international, four quadrant audience.

And on that subject, I’d put more faith in Netflix than in the guy who treated Dr. Pimple Popper and 90 Day Fiancé with the same reverence as a Scorsese or Nolan film when he first listed them on HBO Max.

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Nuff said

Not that there is anything wrong with any film or TV show of any kind. Including the steamy Heated Rivalry, which I have every intention of watching in between this year’s Oscar movies – at the theatre and at home.

On my couch. 

Doom scrolling.

The Beach Boys – “In My Room”

How Bout Decency?

The #1 TV show on Netflix last week was Baby Reindeer, an excellent seven-part limited series about a struggling comedian/bar worker and his middle-aged female stalker.  Adapted by comic performer Richard Gadd from his one-man play, it is based on a true account of events, many of which happened to him.

There are a lot of ways to describe each of the half-hour episodes of this riveting story and, knowing I’d be recommending it to friends, students and readers, I’ve struggled in how exactly to describe it.

What are you baby reindeer?

It’s funny but it also deals with trauma, mental health and sexual abuse.  So my plan to simply call it a dramedy felt a bit like a cop out. 

Wikipedia refers to it as a black comedy drama-thriller miniseries but, well, isn’t almost everything on TV that’s not Young Sheldon?

Calm down, Shelly.

Netflix wisely doesn’t put it into any category except #1, which at the end of the day is what almost every distributor, network, studio, streamer or executive of any kind cares about anyway.

Apropos of this and more, I just read that as he fired many creative and business people under him, and gutted many of his company’s most beloved divisions (Note: TCM, anyone?), Warner Bros/Discovery president and CEO David (The Zazz) Zaslav saw his yearly salary rise 26.5% in 2023 to $49.7 million (Note: All that for elongating the writer and actor’s strike in order to punish content creators for ….something, and renaming HBO to the somehow slightly sleazy-sounding MAX).

UGH!

And on the agency side, Endeavor CEO Ari Emanuel’s 2023 pay package was $83.9 million, including salary, stock and bonuses, with a lot of it coming from his role as CEO of Endeavor-controlled WWE (Worldwide Wresting Entertainment) and UFC (Ultimate Fighting Championship). 

Nevertheless, when you make four times what you made the previous year, in most corners these days it’s counted as a win-win-win-win. Who cares that longtime WWE founder/leader, as well as Trump bestie, Vince MacMahon, finally resigned only a mere few months ago while under criminal investigation for longtime sexual abuse and trafficking charges?  A buck’s, a buck.

UGHHHHHHHHHH

But I digress.

Though perhaps not.

Because all this got me thinking once more about the obscene amounts of money to be made from just about anything, or any type of behavior, in fiction or in real life, whether it be categorized as great, awful or, well, something in between.

So much money

There used to be a sort of universal definition for all kinds obscene behaviors (Note: Or wins, as some of these behaviors are now considered) in financial and personal interactions.  This is not to say there were always immediate consequences or that we could always define what obscene, or synonyms like abhorrent, truly were when accepted by people or in behavior.

Yet as US Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart famously stated in a 1964 ruling about the definition of pornography, and by extension obscenity, in a famous case where he wound up declaring Louis Malle’s 1958 film The Lovers, was, indeed, NOT the latter:

I know it when I see it.

… and that’s that

Still, audio this week from the five male conservative SCOTUS justices indicates they think a US President (Note: Donald Trump) might be immune from criminal prosecution for trying to pressure and cajole legislators and election officials, as well as cheat and otherwise try to undo his 2020 election loss.

Obscene?  Abhorrent?  Or just plain reasonable behavior?  What say all of YOU?

And then imagine what the line of agreement will be between “those guys” and the other three liberal, and one only “strangely conservative,” FEMALE SCOTUS justices over what kind of behaviors, actions or even thoughts constitute PORNOGRAPHIC or OBSCENE???

The mind boggles. 

Like my new hair??

And apologies for planting those images in your mind.

But this all somehow leads to the single intersection I had this week of HOPE with that dark, and ever darkening, side:

-Those themes of violence and abuse etched amid the jokes and humanity in Baby Reindeer.

-That gross imbalance of paydays certain top industry CEOs received last year while actors, writers, and below-the-line crews in IATSE, the people who create their content, the gas fueling their gargantuan paychecks, were left no alternative but to strike for many months or endure endless, arm-twisting renegotiations for even a vaguely fair deal.

-The unapologetic, very partisan and very extreme conservative agenda of every male member of the US Supreme Court as they brazenly rule to take away women’s rights over their own bodies and now attempt to bend long held common sense legal norms in order to excuse the bad and often heinous behavior of one of their politically like-minded, presidential-level BROS, and future BROS.

… help

And no, that intersection of HOPE won’t be ushering in the return of Barack Obama to the White House in some fantasy presidential draft, much as you might be hoping for that.

Oddly, it was the comments made by SNL’s Colin Jost in his comic roast of journalists, current events, Trump and, yes, President Joe Biden, at this weekend’s annual Washington Correspondent’s Dinner that brought HOPE home for me.  A dinner that for 100 plus years has given scholarships to young, aspiring reporters and awards for outstanding  journalism in the country during the past year.

Out from behind the desk

After a bunch of very pithy, and even some flat-footed lines and jabs on presidential politics, this year’s candidates for POTUS, the reporting of news and the slow unraveling of the American social fabric that used to bind red and blue America together, Jost concluded his remarks with a touching and telling story about his recently deceased firefighter grandfather.

He noted his family hails from the predominantly Republican N.Y.C. borough of Staten Island, where “70% were for Trump” in the last election. Yet he said that the last time his 90 plus year-old grandfather voted, he told him he cast his ballot for Biden.

Get your tissues ready

At which point he turned directly from the center stage podium to Pres. Biden on the dais and said:

He voted for you in the last election he ever voted in.  He voted for you, and the reason he voted for you is that you’re a decent man. 

My grandpa voted for decency and decency is why we’re all here tonight. Decency is how we’re able to be here tonight. 

Decency is how we’re able to make jokes about each other and one of us doesn’t go to prison after….

 …And when you look at the levels of freedom throughout history and even around the world today, this  is the exception  This freedom is incredibly rare.  And the journalists in this room help protect that freedom and we cannot ever take that for granted. 

I’m not much for moralizing but it made me wonder if it’s true decency that we crave. 

Is this the lawn sign we need?

Not decency dictated by the resurrected rules of an obscure, 1864 anti-abortion law in Arizona, but 21st century decency that takes into account the beliefs of the majority of Americans living here today.  This includes not only freedom of speech but freedom of the press.

Here are some actual words, names and adjectives Trump publicly used when he was president, and in the years since, to describe reporters and other members of the media:

Truly sick people, fake news, enemy of the people, totally corrupt, an evil propaganda machine, total losers, out of control, dishonest, crooked, deranged, pure evil, scum of the earth, lying and disgusting.

how did we tolerate this??

Not to mention the public mocking imitation of one disabled reporter, the chants of lock ‘em up and threats to take away broadcast licenses and change the libel laws in order to prosecute newspapers and radio/TV outlets for printing or reporting stories one (or HE) disagrees with.

It makes you think about constitutes true decency and more than hints at what is truly indecent in 2024.

Elvis Costello & The Attractions – “(What’s So Funny ‘Bout) Peace, Love and Understanding”