The Full Ginsburg? I’d never heard of it. And you’d think having a name as, well, distinctive as Ginsberg (mine’s with an “e” and not a “u” but still…) that it might have crossed my culture vulture desk. Imagine my surprise then when last week I happen upon a Facebook posting from moveon.org – an organization of which I was an early member – commie, liberal that I am – and the following joke video appeared chastising the new law in (Kentucky? Alabama? Tennessee? Oklahoma? Does it matter?) that makes it illegal to discuss or even mention the word gay in classrooms where students are not over the age of 14.
Well, at least they got the cause right.
I promptly googled “The Full Ginsberg” (which I will now and forever refer to as TFG because I can’t keep misspelling my own damn name) and this is what the ever reliable Wikipedia came up with:
The “Full Ginsburg“ is a buzzword that refers to an appearance by one person on all five American major Sunday-morning interview shows on the same day: This Week on ABC, Fox News Sunday, Face the Nation on CBS, Meet the Press on NBC, and Late Edition on CNN. State of the Union replaced Late Edition on CNN in January 2009.
The term is named for William H. Ginsburg, the lawyer for Monica Lewinsky during the sexual conduct scandal involving President Bill Clinton. Ginsburg was the first person to accomplish this feat, on February 1, 1998.
How could I have missed that? Or at least been included in the discussion. As NY Congressman Anthony Weiner is now fully realizing, sometimes these ideas just take hold and no matter how much you try to protest – when it’s “out there” on the internet, it is (or in his case, you are) out there forever. Though in his case it might not be him. Which would, indeed, be too bad for him. No, I am not inserting (bad use of verbs) the photo.
Not wanting to be out there all alone with my new found moniker, I’ve decided to include a few others. No, I have not borrowed this sketch from “Real Time With Bill Maher.” Yet after reading it over it does sound oddly familiar to what his writers do. Though nowhere near as cutting edge.
The Full Bradley Cooper: Seducing a known or unknown actress every 7-10 days while still managing to star in the #1 movie of the week, withstand bad reviews, make films with both Robert DeNiro AND Martin Scorsese and speak impressively fluent French on television.
Hate him? Or love him?
The Full Palin: Employing a secret geographically unspecific sing-song twang to magnetize tens of millions of dollars in your direction, hypnotize many more millions of minions into your followers while rendering the rest of the population powerless to stop you.
The Full Tarantino: Using your considerable talents to achieve meteoric creative success while proving time and time again that not everyone should act.
The Full Glee: The art of taking an unlimited amount of good will for granted and not funneling it back with enough power, verve or concentration into your cast or the world at large.
(Fox would not release a clip to us)
The Full U.S. Economy: Yo-yo binging and purging at its most extreme.
The Full Trump: Taking a term from the card game bridge and broadening the brand to encompass over the top real estate, over the top television, over the top hair weaves and over-the top lame-brained conspiracy theories.
The Full Zooey Deschanel: Using doe eyes and vintage dresses to score cool supporting and starring movie roles only to launch a career in half hour three-camera tv comedy.
The Full Suze Orman: Combining no-nonsense Chicago common sense, SERIOUSLY no-nonsense lesbian power and fully loaded common sense money managing into an empire worthy of a lifetime’s supply of colorful jackets and ‘I’m in on the joke’ “Saturday Night Live” spoofs.
The Full Mitt: Running for the WHITE house on a haircut, a family photo, some pearly whites and alot of prayers.
I could go on and on since clearly this entire line of reasoning shows I am certainly the most full of it. So rather than overstay my welcome – why not make it a group effort.
The Full Chelsea Handler?
The Full Kirk Cameron?
The Full L. Ron Hubbard?
Enquiring minds want to know!