Freedom

I’ve been a lifelong in your face, but behind-the-scenes hand-wringing, Democrat. 

The kind of neurotic, over-educated, big city, holier-than-thou bleeding heart liberal that gets parodied in a Saturday Night Live sketch, roasted on Fox News or is constantly and very curtly dismissed in opinion pieces on the pages of the Wall Street Journal.

… and my feelings on this are clear

I don’t remember exactly when this started. 

But I do recall how pissed off I was as a young teenager in 1971 when people laughed at the brilliant and black N.Y.C. Congresswoman Shirley Chisolm when she announced she was running for president.

Clearly, she was the smartest person in the race.  And certainly the most honest and decent.

(Note: Though certainly that wasn’t a high bar).

Go Shirley!

Yes, I was too young to vote but how stupid can people be, I proclaimed to anyone who would listen (Note:  Not many).  It’s so obvious Nixon is a lying sleaze!!

When my own Democratic mother insisted she was voting for Nixon because he promised to end the draft and she didn’t want me to die in Vietnam, I didn’t talk to her for a week.

If the Army drafts me, we’re in a lot of trouble, I screamed back at her. 

And I will not be going to Vietnam, trust me.  

I hadn’t revealed my gay card yet.  But I knew. 

Well, here we are several generations later. 

Yep, still gay.

Gays can be in the military,  a woman of color has been nominated by the Democratic party to run for president and, after a barnstorming convention with record-breaking, meme-making viewership, she is right now favored to win by 3.6%.

As for laughing, all we can hear is the natural belly laugh of the candidate, Kamala Harris, the current U.S. Vice President and California’s own former senator and Attorney General, as she shows her party, the country and the world that a politician can be smart, qualified, tough, loving, articulate, strong, ambitious and yes – human – all at the same time. 

Hate on the joy all you want!

Mrs. Chisolm must be laughing somewhere. 

Among other things.

I don’t give myself much credit for knowing as a teenager that someone other than a straight white male could be president.  I was a little kid growing up in the tumultuous sixties and all you really had to do was look around to realize that one day that could be so.

But it sure was nice to watch the Democratic convention this week and see it happen in such an irresistibly, celebratory fashion as you were being proved right.

Yes she can.

Yes, I know.  Not so fast.  She hasn’t won yet. Just as all seemed lost six weeks ago, that’s how quickly this lead, this enthusiasm, this OPTIMISM can disappear.

But can’t we be happy about anything EVER? 

Yes. We. Can.

Bask in the sunshine please!

I won’t recap the record number of unprecedented moments of joy among Democrats over a four-day convention (Note: The previous record must have been two or three vs. what now clearly tallies well into the thousands). 

But I do want to reclaim some of those moments for one overall point of personal privilege.

I realized once and for all after four days of watching the DNC that:

a. I am MUCH more patriotic than I thought.

AND

b. I don’t at all mind a sports metaphor.  It simply depends on who is using it.  And why.

yay sports!

Yes, it would be so much more fun to talk about Barack Obama cracking a thinly-veiled d-ck joke re: Trump’s crowd size, or Michelle Obama down and dirty wondering aloud, in her best south side of Chicago accent re: his 2024 presidential run: …Who’s gonna tell him that the job he is currently seeking might just be one of those “Black jobs?”

But they say it so much better than I do.  And it’s available on You Tube.

Barack (7:30):

Michelle (11:30):

Instead, I have to confess that it was VP nominee, Coach Tim Walz who made me see it wasn’t so much that I hated playing team sports at school, which fueled a life-long annoyance at pretty much any team sports analogy under the sun.

It was that I loathed every high school gym teacher and sports coach I ever encountered in real life until I “met” him – the guy who not only coached football AND taught social studies, (Note: Not health ed!)  but served as faculty advisor to the gay/straight alliance at the high school where he worked.

Coach!

I don’t know that Kyle Chandler’s beloved (Note: Even by me) Coach Eric Taylor on Friday Night Lights would have done that, and he was a fictional character.

So when Tim Walz started to close out his acceptance speech for Vice President by stating:

Team, it’s the fourth quarter, we’re down a field goal, but we’re on offense and we’ve got the ball. We’re driving down the field. And, boy, do we have the right team, I was all in. 

Yay sports!

And when he ended by sayingOur job for everyone watching—is to get in the trenches and do the blocking and tackling: one inch at a time. One yard at a time, one phone call at a time, one door knock at a time, one $5 donation at a time. …Look, we got 76 days. That’s nothing. There’ll be time to sleep when you’re dead. We’re going to leave it on the field! I was sold.

GO TEAM GOOOOOOOO

Yes, it helped that my beloved aunt in New York City also used to say you’ll have plenty of time to sleep when you’re dead  to little whiny me when I balked at doing something hard, but that’s not the only reason.

As for over-the-top patriotism, anyone who came of age under Nixon, or more recently, Trump, has probably had a difficult time with it. 

Too often the empty gestures of in-your-face flag-waving or a robust hand over your heart when the national anthem played was the measure of a patriot. And protesting the actions of your country, your president, your lawmakers or the actual laws themselves meant you were a…traitor?… a Commie?… a Soviet/Russia spy?

Me?

Well, the tables have certainly been turned on all that, and most particularly on the latter, in this presidential race, haven’t they?

That’s how a new patriotism coined by Vice President Harris in her nominating speech – one that not only moved me but, I suspect, millions of others who knew in their hearts it wasn’t a song, a salute or the stars and stripes that made a patriot yet never had the right words to say exactly what did – came across:

In her own words

I… see an America where we hold fast to the fearless belief that built our nation and inspired the world. That here, in this country, anything is possible. That nothing is out of reach.  An America where we care for one another, look out for one another and recognize that we have so much more in common than what separates us. That none of us — none of us has to fail for all of us to succeed.  And that in unity, there is strength. You know, our opponents in this race are out there every day denigrating America, talking about how terrible everything is. Well, my mother had another lesson she used to teach: Never let anyone tell you who you are. You show them who you are.

America, let us show each other and the world who we are and what we stand for: Freedom, opportunity, compassion, dignity, fairness and endless possibilities.

We are the heirs to the greatest democracy in the history of the world. And on behalf of our children and our grandchildren and all those who sacrificed so dearly for our freedom and liberty, we must be worthy of this moment.  It is now our turn to do what generations before us have done, guided by optimism and faith, to fight for this country we love, to fight for the ideals we cherish and to uphold the awesome responsibility that comes with the greatest privilege on Earth: the privilege and pride of being an American. So let’s get out there, let’s fight for it. Let’s get out there, let’s vote for it, and together, let us write the next great chapter in the most extraordinary story ever told.

(Full speech here)

I didn’t write it, I didn’t say it, but for the first time in a long time I finally felt it.

Beyonce (ft. Kendrick Lamar) – “Freedom”

Climbing That Hill

After a fantastic week of Joe, Kamala and Amanda Gorman, a 22 year-old young woman who made me love poetry once again for the first time since my early twenties, it started to happen.

I began falling into the…

ABYSS.

to the sunken place I go

Strange the way it creeps up on you.  And even stranger how, once you get to be a certain age and have had enough therapy, you know how to begin to creep out.

What brought me careening down there after this cataclysmic week of exciting firsts?

  • L.A. house arrest to avoid a virus
  • Vaccine searching fatigue
  • Zoom communication (meetings, teaching, and even socializing)
  • Screen watching fatigue (what was once fun and decadent now feels dronish and labored no matter how much YOU liked it and swear I MUST see it).
  • Fascism and other tales percolating from the dark side of nowhere
The true spirit of this week #onlyBerniememeIwillshare

Of course, this is merely a partial list.  Feel free to add on and subtract for yourself as you see fit.

I was sort of embarrassed to write this because of the privilege I enjoy.  White, employed (Note: Well, for now, nothing is permanent), happily married, friends, house, food, shelter and pasta guilt-free more nights than I can count because, more than anything else, THAT’S allowed these days).

Still, living through these times feels like dancing on the head of a pin too often than not.  At any point you can slip and impale yourself.  Perhaps not too badly but just enough that a small puncture slowly turns into a crack, and then a wound, which gets larger and larger and then suddenly emerges as a…gaping hole

Nothing to see here… totally normal day

And, you know, that can’t be good.  Imagine what awaits you when you’re fully sucked down inside.

Um, no….THAT’S not what I mean.

Seriously.

Living in Los Angeles, California has had so many benefits but the most recent downside is navigating at the epicenter of U.S. Covid-19.  We’re averaging well over 10,000 new cases daily and more than one million overall. 

Our home state of California has over 3.4. million cases thus far, the most of any state in the country.  When you consider there are just shy of 25 million people infected in the entire U.S. that means we account for almost 20% of cases.

We’re #1! We’re #1! #uhoh

And yet, we have far less vaccines available than other states. A friend in Florida told me it was easy peasy to register for your shot.  Yet the first day you could register in L.A. county, the site crashed, appointments were cancelled and many of us (Note: ME) spent hours trying to book vaccinations at sketchy clinics that wanted ALL your insurance info online and STILL didn’t manage to offer a definite spot for both shots.

If I didn’t know any better, I’d think the Trump administration had it in for California and gave Florida a larger part of our vaccines just cause HE lives there.

But I’m not a conspiracy theorist.

Yet.

Searches Etsy for fashionable tin foil hats

Nevertheless, it did give me a lesson on how others might have begun to succumb. 

This, of course, was countered by watching a kind and decent man being sworn into the presidency pledging that his first priority would be fixing the CoVid mess by listening to SCIENCE and not poll numbers.

But what was even more encouraging has been his appointment of seemingly EVERY top expert in EVERY field of government to do that and much more AND to, in turn, save the Republic.

(Note: It also didn’t hurt that not ONE of them was related to him by either blood OR marriage).

Like magic… BUT REAL!

Call me crazy (and many have) but I found this to be oddly encouraging.  That and watching the unmuzzled Dr. Anthony Fauci spreading honesty on TV once again, particularly about all things CoVid.  He even got down in the weeds and reassured crazies like me that there is NO real difference between the Pfizer and Moderna shot and that the only reason he took the Moderna one was that it happened to be the one available the day he had his vaccination at the National Institute of Health.  But that he would have done either.

Speaking of straight shooters, AND decency, tell your Fox News viewing relatives there is neither to be found there.  Sean Hannity this week had a banner onscreen headline categorizing Joe Biden’s first week as president  “DISASTROUS.”  Not sure if this was due to the one million shots for the first 100 day pledge, which was already being met after several days in office, or the US reentering both the Paris Climate Agreement and the World Health Organization.

My charitable way of saying “you are a moron”

Still, they did surface with two compelling Biden scandals.  Our new president has the temerity to wear a Rolex watch AND owns and exercises on a Peleton bike.

Oh, the no golden toilet of it all!  Oh, the shame!!

The President EXERCISES?!

Sure, I’m being snide but I’ve found that’s one way to brighten up my world and get by.  The other is to take in the fact that after four years DECENCY might actually be back in vogue. 

How do I know? 

Well, when Second Gentleman Doug Emhoff was walking down Constitution Avenue with his wife, VICE PRESIDENT KAMALA HARRIS OF CALIFORNIA, he made international news just for briefly stopping and doubling back where they had previously been in order to retrieve the earring that had just fallen out of her ear.

So shocking was this act of valor in these days, I heard one journalist this week actually say on air, where do you make copies of a guy like that?

Get yourself a man that would wear your name on a t-shirt! #weloveDougie

Yes, that’s how starved we’ve been and how low the decency bar is.  Which means imagining how high we might get back to during the next four years is indeed something to live on for and celebrate no matter how long it takes to get us all immunized so we can return to hugging (and more) in person again.

Though if all that doesn’t do it for you, reveling in the words and images of our young poet laureate on Inauguration Day was a real, um…shot in the arm for my psyche, not to mention a reliable booster on each awful day since.  And that was even AFTER listening to Gaga sing the National Anthem with a giant Dove on her chest.

It was the gold mic choreography that really got me

I mean, if Amanda Gormans exist in the world – a young person with that much talent, grace and theatrical style – who also overcame a speech impediment – to live perform a POEM(!) she wrote for the ages to the world on Inauguration Day –  how bad are things, really? 

Especially when it leaves us with this life lesson:

..We will raise this wounded world into a wondrous one

We will rise from the gold-limbed hills of the west,

We will rise from the windswept northeast

Where our forefathers first realized revolution

We will rise from the lake-rimmed cities of the midwestern states,

We will rise from the sunbaked south

We will rebuild, reconcile and recover

and every known nook of our nation and

every corner called our country,

our people diverse and beautiful will emerge,

battered and beautiful

When day comes we step out of the shade,

aflame and unafraid

The new dawn blooms as we free it

For there is always light,

if only we’re brave enough to see it

If only we’re brave enough to be it

Lady Gaga – “The Star Spangled Banner”

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