The Big O

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…Everybody is talented, original and has something important to say.

– Brenda Ueland, 1938, If You Want to Write

You can choose to be original or you can choose to take the easy road and be derivative.  If this sounds like a value judgment – it is.  Like many entertainment fans, I’ve grown weary of creative laziness, especially in the movie business.  I’m even tired of reading about it.  Certainly, I’m tired of writing about it.  So for at least a single moment I hesitated before deciding it’s a subject that once again needs addressing since the subject is, by definition, not even vaguely original.

But last weekend I went to see a wonderfully original new film called The Spectacular Now at one of the scheduled weekend screenings at the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences.  Normally these Sunday night screenings are fairly crowded yet, sadly, this one was less than half-filled.  Which is too bad.  Because after attending about 10 of these free movie nights this summer, which often feature the top creative people from the film in a short talk back afterwards to the top creative professionals in Hollywood (well, they must be the top- they’re the ones who vote for the Oscars, gosh darn it!), this one was by far the best.

Truly Spectacular

Truly Spectacular

The reason this film was so much better than anything else you will see this summer is because it is one of the few movies made by people for no other reason than passion for a script and a story.  The money wasn’t particularly great, there is no chance for a franchise, a television spinoff, or even a videogame, AND the process of getting this project off the ground took five years – much of it spent with its creators seeing little hope of ever making it to that prestigious Sunday night film series.

Still, they persevered.  It sort of gives you hope.  And if it doesn’t, it should.

Nothing about the subject matter of this film is new.  It’s a coming-of-age story about what happens when the funny, fast-talking charmer in high school wakes up after a drunk night on the lawn of the fresh-faced, smart, high school good girl who would be wrongly mistaken as unhip by TMZ.  Their relationship is not an offshoot of what happens post detention in a Breakfast Club type world but it could be seen that way from the trailer.  It is also not a rip-off of a great character arc on beloved television shows like Friday Night Lights or Dawson’s Creek but no doubt some people will be determined to view it that regard.

This is a movie that instead unfolds solely on its own terms and in its own unique way.   The script was adapted by the writers of 500 Days of Summer, Scott Neustadter & Michael H. Weber, from a novel written by Tim Tharp that was nominated for the National Book Award.  It is worth noting that 500 Days was an original script and the first movie produced by these writers, and the novel was the first breakout hit for the novelist, who teaches college and lives in Oklahoma.  Neither of them are, as they say, veterans capable of snapping their fingers and getting magic reviews and attention for their work.

In fact, the script languished for three years despite getting excellent buzz from Hollywood. It was only when the wonderful young actress from The Descendants, Shailene Woodley, who plays the female lead, read it and asked her representatives why she couldn’t make THAT kind of film after the former picture came out, that anyone became interested again.  Several directors were also attached during that time and fell out leaving it essentially rudderless.  That is until its tireless producer decided to approach a young director who had just done a similarly themed smaller film that had gained some positive response from other people in the creative community but was by no means any kind of financial hit.  Like everyone else before him, he read it and loved the story, though he was initially hesitant to do so when someone at his production company pitched him the story as a one-liner.  Luckily, he was not yet a jaded enough director who thought he knew better than the people who worked with him and read the script anyway.  And was immediately convinced. As was the producer after they met over beers and the director presented a 50-page book of how he proposed to shoot this film. (Take Note: The producer is Tom McNulty and the director is James Ponsoldt).

Team Perserverance: From left, Ms. Woodley, actor Miles Teller, screenwriter MIchael H. Weber, Director James Ponsoldt, screenwriter Scott Neustadter, producer Tom McNulty and producer Michelle Krumm.

Team Perserverance: From left, Ms. Woodley, actor Miles Teller, screenwriter MIchael H. Weber, Director James Ponsoldt, screenwriter Scott Neustadter, producer Tom McNulty and producer Michelle Krumm.

The Spectacular Now is not likely to go down as one of the top 10 great movies in the annals of film history but it’s a damn good one.    It’s human and it connects to its audience in a deceptively simple way that is only achievable by people who are trying to connect for real.  Unfortunately, that used to be more the norm in the industry than it is today.

Too often we all do creative work for the wrong reasons and once you’ve been in the business for a while you see how it happens.  You need to make a living, you want to keep working, you’re building a brand, you want something (anything) to take your mind off of your lousy life, you’re accepting the best of what’s out there, you need a new kitchen, you’re bored or you simply want to feed your family.  All are perfectly valid reasons but all together they don’t come close to the real reason most people get into the business – to express themselves in their own original way.

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Every week the entertainment industry serves up a slew of both derivative and original offerings.  Yes – EVERY week.  They are not often the most promoted TV programs, or films, or live presentations, or online entertainment.  But they are there.  This even includes announcements of new projects or talent, and even promotions in the executive suites.  If you look closely you can take your pick.  There is quite a lot of good or bad, depending on whatever floats your boat.

This week had a host of choices.  There was NBC’s big bold announcement that is was embarking on a huge four hour television remake of the classic film Rosemary’s Baby – one of the only films I’ve managed to show to almost every screenwriting class I’ve ever taught that gets 99% positive reaction.  What is the motivation to remake a classic film that takes place in NY in the sixties and is, for the most part, really about the 60s, and reset it in…Paris?  Is it about originality?  Trying to build on something that could now be original because they didn’t get it right the first time?  I don’t think so.  I SO don’t think so.

A force of nature

Joke all you want about Sharknado, but the filmmakers are not laughing.  The ratings numbers of this recent camp classic have grown from 1.4 to 1.9 million viewers and who knows what the third showing will be next week – or the grosses for the midnight screenings that are now set at movie theaters across the country.  See, original doesn’t have to be high art.  There’s nothing wrong with giving people a good time when you decide that’s what you’re doing and put your talent into doing it the best way you can.  The writer of Sharknado, a man with the distinctive name of Thunder Levin, knew he wanted to make an over the top sci-fi film and did it.  It doesn’t matter that’s it’s known for being campy and silly if that was its original intention all along.  What isn’t admirable is just throwing something together with not an original thought in your head and hoping against hope of getting by while you’re boring us and making money in the process.

A class act

A class act

This week the Motion Picture Academy announced it had hired its first African American president – a terrific woman named Cheryl Boone Isaacs.  She’s a marketing executive who started in the business in the late seventies and I had the pleasure of working with her a bit early in my career.  She was smart, talented and classy  – which is more than you can say for most Hollywood executives who’ve had a career as long as she has.  She also had a terrific brother who was one of the first male African American executives in Hollywood.  His name was Ashley Boone and he was the head of marketing at Twentieth Century and responsible for marketing Star Wars.  He later went on to market Chariots of Fire to a surprising best picture Academy award.  He was also, like his sister, smart, talented and classy.  And, like his sister, an original because unlike a lot of his cohorts he always went about his work in a respectful yet smartly dedicated manner.  You’d be surprised how rare that is still and how original it seemed when he did it back in the late 70s and early 80s.

When you go down an original road you have the ability to not be riding the derivative wave of an established trend for whatever scraps you can keep as they fall off.  You have the potential to be a trend setter – helping to create something that people want to follow.  That thing can be a product, an art form, or you or perhaps some combination of all three.  Which is probably why you wanted to do it in the first place – if at one time you ever liked what you were doing.

Too often it’s too easy to go with the flow and not go with your gut. I’ve done it.  We all have.  Suggestion to not keep doing it: Go see The Spectacular Now and think about why a small movie that shouldn’t work at all seems to work on almost every level.  It might then be wise for all of us to consider not how we can imitate it but what are the simple stories of our own that we want to bring to light in the world.  That’s a thought not only for writers but everyone.   If you don’t believe me read Brenda Ueland’s seminal book about Art, Independence and Spirit mentioned above.  She offered many of the same thoughts and more almost 80 years ago.  But it’s still worth reading because in addition to that it’s all done in her own original way.

Because We Can?

Definitely not kosher.

Definitely not kosher.

There’s a famous scene in Woody Allen’s Husbands and Wives where the brilliant Judy Davis plays Sally, a recent divorcee who terrorizes the unlucky new guy she is about to leave with on their first date when he tries to reassure her that not all men are, essentially, cads.

Davis, sneering with the authority of a jilted Medea, turns sharply to him and, after a long scary moment, ferociously roars: Don’t defend your sex!  It’s true!

Judy Davis is not in the house tonight (which is too bad for so many reasons), but I couldn’t help feel those words reverberating in my head many times almost every time I came across a news story this week.  If you’re an adult male of, well, any age, it’s pretty hard to stick up for the peanut gallery of ass hats who have been making it so much more difficult for all of the rest of us deeply flawed males in the world to hold our heads – well – not even high, just upright.

Who knew of these three Spitzer would come out smelling like roses?

Who knew of these three Spitzer would come out smelling like roses?

1. NYC mayoral candidate Anthony Weiner and his serial sexting.  Oy.

2. San Diego Mayor Bob Filner and his serial gropings (not to mention female headlocks). Oy vey.

And even:

3. Fox “newscaster” Geraldo Rivera posting a shirtless (naked?) photo of himself on Twitter declaring:  “70 is the new 50.”   Oy, no.

This should help get Geraldo out of your head.

This should help get Geraldo out of your head.

This is not to even mention in the last several weeks:

4. Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker signing a bill that REQUIRES all women seeking to terminate a pregnancy to undergo a mandatory ultrasound in order to bond with the fetus and potentially save it.

5. Texas Governor Rick Perry and his mostly male cohorts in the state legislature passing a law that will not only close 37 of the state’s 42 women’s health clinics but will also require all females to get their doctor’s approval before being allowed to obtain full doses of the morning after pill.

And even:

6. Virginia Attorney General (and current gubernatorial candidate) Ken Cuccinelli desperately trying to resurrect an old edict that outlaws sodomy, oral sex and just about any other kind of sex aside from the missionary position (could I make this up?) in the state.  Note: Certainly this is not so much anti-female as anti- human, not to mention what it will do to tourism, but it bears inclusion nevertheless.

They might want to reconsider motto.

They might want to reconsider this motto.

WHAT.     IS.       GOING.       ON????????????????????

Okay, so I’ve taken a survey and this is what I’ve come up with:

A. The intellectuals reason that this is the final expected retro grasp of the white male heterosexual patriarchy trying to expel its last burst of ever-dwindling authority over the rest of us.

My reaction:  Too glib.

B. The liberals blame Weiner and Filner for being idiots and blame the rest of this stuff on bigoted, hypocritical Republicans who want to require all of us to go to the Church of their choosing and re-institute school prayer (and Ayn Rand), as we await the Rapture.

My reaction: Too easy, not to mention impractical. 

C. And finally – The women I know, ALL of the women I know (which is many because, after all, I am a homosexual) are just plain disgusted.

My reaction: The correct response.

Though they are thinking about bringing back castration.

My reaction to that:  Uh, sorry ladies – the wrong response!!  

But still  —  who could blame them????

You should be sweating!

You should be sweating!

I haven’t seen such a motley group of guys since high school gym class – a class I, granted, did not attend much but one in which I was able to observe behavior on most days I was in attendance because I did little other than observe while I was there.

Weiner: I’m not gonna say he’s a dick because that’s too easy.  What I will say is that in the first go ‘round I didn’t understand why everyone was making such a fuss about a guy who liked to send naked pictures of himself to women who showed some interest, and occasionally pleasured himself over it when his wife was away.  I cared more about how he did his job, not what he did in bed (or out of it, or even standing up).  Also, like most native New Yorkers I began to resent the outcry from the morality police in the rest of the country (as if they’ve never done anything tawdry – and if they haven’t they certainly couldn’t relate to most of the rest of us), so I decided I’d give him the benefit of the doubt and show my support out of sheer Big Apple spite.

Field day is putting it mildly.

Field day is putting it mildly.

However, there comes a time – hard as it is for me, a Scorpio, to admit – that even spitefulness has to give way to common sense.  Suddenly, we now get online pix of the Full Monty Weiner.  Then we’re treated to a spinning press conference where his highly intelligent spouse, Huma Abedin, does a millennial generation version of Hillary Clinton standing by her man as she bares the details of her personal life to the world in an attempt to defend a flawed guy she happens to love who clearly and very desperately wants to remain in the politically relevant limelight.

Okay.  But then, just when you thought it was over, there are more naked Wieners revealed, as well as rolling admissions by the candidate of there being “6-10 women” he’s met online as recently as six months ago, though he can’t be sure of the actual number since behavior that is immoral is a matter of personal opinion – the implication being his opinion is that he has done nothing else wrong with #’s 11, 12, 13 or more….

It wasn't me, it was Carlos Danger!

It wasn’t me, it was Carlos Danger!

Yuk.  I think I need a shower.  Don’t you?  Not because I give an Instagram about whether Mr. Weiner is, indeed, a large tool but because he has become an impossible public figure to govern what is perhaps the most important and complicated city in the country – primarily at his own hands (pun intended, sorry).

Addendum:  Recently, I was shocked to learn that Mr. Weiner was 6’5”.  As a Jewish guy from New York, I’d always assumed he was closer to around, say, 5’7”.  My height.  It just goes to show what I’ve always secretly hoped – bigger doesn’t necessarily mean better – especially when it has to do with wieners.

Filner: Any 70 year-old man who has, with the women he employs, chosen to:

  1. Put them in headlocks
  2. Grope their asses
  3. Asked them to come to work not wearing underwear
  4. Forced them to hug him, kiss him and tongue him and
  5. Rinsed and repeated on all of these behaviors many times over —

SHOULD. GO. AWAY.

Do Not Pass Go and go directly to Jail

Do Not Pass Go and go directly to Jail

Instead, San Diego Mayor Bob Filner gave a press conference Friday where he announced he was entering a two-week program in behavior counseling for…well, something – WHEN his microphone cut out the audio and we couldn’t hear what it was he was actually going away for.  One wag tweeted that “even the mic didn’t want to hear,” but this didn’t stop the mayor and his staff from getting him another mic and podium so he could restart his mea culpa from the beginning (Oh, goodie).  And speaking of staff, just after the revelations of sexual misconduct towards women came out days before – the San Diego city attorney announced that as an interim measure the mayor, who still refuses to resign, would no longer be allowed to be alone in a room with any female who worked for him.  At all.  This was particularly fascinating since that same press release also stated that Mayor Filner had just hired yet another woman to replace his exiting chief of staff. Certainly it gave new meaning to the term team players for everyone else nearby.

By the way, the fact that both Mr. Weiner and Mayor Filner are Democrats is meaningless.  This has nothing to do with political affiliation as current Republican Louisiana Senator David Vitter (you know, the former Congressman who was kicked out of office in the prostitution scandal, then reelected) and current Republican Congressman Mark Sanford (he’s the former South Carolina Governor who a few years ago disappeared to Argentina with his mistress when his aides told us he couldn’t be reached because he was out camping – the gayest excuse I’ve ever heard a straight guy give) serve as only two of the most recent analogous examples of sex scandals from the other side.

Who knew Animal House would be so right??

Who knew Animal House would be so right??

No, what this all has to do with is this:  When it comes to the penis, and everything it connotes for them – some men have remained in permanent adolescence.  Sexual compulsion/addiction; it’s about power, not sex; generational shifts in mores; they’re all just the extreme examples; blah, blah, blah –  I get it.  But as a guy, I gotta tell you – there has been too much of this kind of stuff in the news lately to intellectualize it away.  There’s something going on with some of us men out there and it’s not pretty.  Or even handsome.  Actually, it’s kind of abhorrent.  And unless the rest of us guys stand up to the bullies it’s not gonna go away any time soon.   I’m not talking about what guys do in the privacy of their own – well, you know.   I’ll be the first one to fight back against anyone who says we have to stop doing any of that.  I’m talking about – well, you know what I’m talking about.

Screenwriter John Patrick Shanley pondered a variation of all this in his Oscar-winning screenplay, Moonstruck.  Faced with the knowledge of her philandering husband, Olympia Dukakis (the Mom) spends her time surveying various opinions of the other characters on one particular question:  Why do men cheat?  Finally, one person, the biggest philanderer in the film, gives her the only answer that ultimately makes sense:  Because they fear death.

Interesting answer.  But it’s movie dialogue.  As it applies to the mistreatment of today’s women via sexual scandal, which is not about so much as cheating but behaving like an immature idiot – the answer in the real world is more like: Because we can.

Though just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.  That might sound like a response from someone’s mother.  But maybe it wouldn’t hurt to think about it that way.  After all, Mom’s a woman, too.  And us men, we’re just wieners.